I was sitting alone at a coffee shop trying to force out a few scenes before my shift at Tjmaxx was to start and, there she was. She was wearing a knock-off a Chanel scent you may have seen in Belk or Macy’s, however she still possessed that sophisticated mind – Expensive purse and coat scent that always seemed to quicken my pulse. Her auburn hair and common brown eyes was the stuff of legend as far I was concerned, and I was indeed deeply concerned.  

Let’s be clear. I felt no emotional obligation to this girl at first. In fact I had no true romantic intentions with her.  To be quite honest I felt more of a sense of fascination than infatuation. My fascination lied in the fact while she projected a strong southern vibe that I could never relate to, all of her actions suggested otherwise. She was a conundrum that beckoned to be explored and so I did.

Typically I have no problem talking to the estranged, due mainly to the fact that I’d more than likely would never see them again but with her I felt my palms begin to get sweaty and my heart start to beat at the speed of light. I was nervous. More Nervous than I’ve ever been, but I had already started walking to the table she was sitting at. She was reading a light novel. The type of novel one wouldn’t typically consider to be of a high reading level but that was the least of my concerns at the moment. I was far more concerned with the cold stare she had given me as she had realized I was walking towards her with an uncomfortable demeanor about myself that screamed hormonal teenage boy. She had dealt with the likes of me before. 

After what seemed like an eternity I finally arrived at the table and was under the impression that I’d be able to speak, but as I stared at her eyes I found myself almost trapped in her gaze. I quickly tried to focus on something else, upon doing so I found myself staring at her nametag. She was grace…in name and in essence. It was at this moment that I realized that she was very beautiful indeed.

I asked to sit and despite those few awkward seconds of silence she smiled and said “Sure thing” which sounded more like a symphony of endless social potential. We talked for quite some time. Topics ranged from our theories on the mystery behind the universe’s existence and this week’s episode of the walking dead. The conversation was flowing naturally in a very new way for me. I didn’t feel as though I was pushing words out of my mouth, instead I was being pulled by them. I would have liked to stay forever but it was 5:30 and I was late for work. I asked for her number in the most casual way I could and she gladly gave it to me which was a riveting experience to say the least.

I googled the appropriate time to wait before texting a girl which is unnatural for me because I’d like to consider myself fairly adept at communicating with the opposite sex. I’ve had girlfriends in the past and those relationships were fun and long lasting. Fulfilling? Absolutely not, but I digress. Google has told me to wait two days which seemed logical. 1 day may have been too soon and 3 days may have made it seem as if I wasn’t interested and I definitely was. I don’t quite remember what I texted her which is probably due to the fact that at the time, texting her was the equivalent to disarming a bomb strapped to a child actor. However it was along the lines of “wanna hang out?” and she said yes. Not “sure thing” or “of course” but just “yes”. This struck me in a rather odd sense. I felt as though I was imposing upon her. Insecurity flushed over me and I almost didn’t show up for our meeting at the coffee shop.

Of course I showed up. There was no chance of me missing that date. I was there 15 minutes before our planned time of meeting one another. I noticed her walking up the sidewalk, this time she was wearing thick glasses and her hair was curlier than I remembered which added a level of charm I thought was unachievable. She sat and I felt my stomach doing Olympic gymnast stunts. We talked; this time for hours about film and literature, politics and religion and even our hesitance to socialize with one another. She admitted that she had been admiring me just as I had been admiring her, which only goes to show that women are of the most subtle beings. When the night ended we kissed. It felt like the first time. Her lips were soft and inviting. My arms and her waist fit perfectly into one another as if God had planned this all along. It only lasted for maybe thirty seconds but it felt as if had died gone to heaven then realized that heaven was pretty lame and I’d much rather kiss her.

Truth be told there’s no explanation or hidden meaning behind our meeting. I just know that engaging her was one of the best decisions I think I’ve ever made. Our meeting was illogical and spontaneous and considering the fact that I’m totally neurotic in regards to things that lack knowledge.  I think that that’s the beauty in her and in us. What would seem illogical suddenly makes sense when I’m in her presence. She’s the calculator of my algebraic existence. Granted that was an awful comparison but it was a genuine one. She’s solved my problems. It’s been months and there’s yet to be an instance where I could in any way claim that I regret walking up to her on that boring Sunday afternoon. Nobody has made feel more sure, more confused, more important, and more insignificant (though not intentionally). For a man who is typically rather sure of himself in most aspects of life she makes me question myself and my actions. Indeed I did ask myself many questions and she was the answer every time.