I didn’t realise I liked you until my friend’s sweet 16. When I got there in a dress I didn’t feel comfortable in because I thought it showed too much skin and I saw you, I wished that my dress were just a little bit shorter. And that my hair had a bit more volume so my face didn’t look so big and that my eyeliner had just a little more wing so they would look a little bigger. And when I saw you come up to me to say hello I just smiled and blurted something out without looking at your face because, my god you were so cute. And when I saw my best friend I walked away from you because I was so nervous. And when my friend also agreed you were cute I just nodded and steered her towards the food. Because.

When the birthday girl got out and we all clapped and I was watching her but really, I was just watching you out of the corner of my eye. But only because you were cute and not because I liked you, oh no. Plus, the rack of lamb was really good and you just so happened to be next to it. (Like, 30 ft away from it but still.) And when the dance floor opened up and we all rushed to join in, me bumping into you was a total accident and not because I wanted to be next to you. Me happening to dance near you the entire time was also an accident. And when my bestfriend leaned in and whispered about how cute you were I just shook my head because the music was too loud and I couldn’t (wouldn’t) hear her tell me just how CUTE you looked. And when the birthday girl was lighting her candles and you got up and dragged your chair over to my table, I knew I didn’t have a crush on you because when I moved my chair over a bit, you didn’t notice because you were too busy looking at my best friend. And I just sat there eating my lamb-gone-cold because why not.

Everytime I walked out looking for you I knew that all I had to do was find her and I would find you. And for days after you would send her 30 text messages a night and I know because I am her best friend and she tells me everything. It took you 3 days to reply to mine. And I know you saw it. And here we are, two weeks later. Two weeks of you beating around the bush and being on the fence and now here we are. Me alone. You alone. And my best friend with a boy who never hid his blatant affection for her. And you know what? You're still pretty cute. But your personality’s not.