Sting | Teen Ink

Sting MAG

March 8, 2009
By lexikeys247 SILVER, Forks, Washington
lexikeys247 SILVER, Forks, Washington
7 articles 0 photos 23 comments

You play the game well
sly,
slick,
slithering into the
souls of helpless young girls
just to
sting them with your poison
and leave them aching
sick.
sick venom spreading,
infiltrating red blood,
to pour out in clear form
from her eyes uncontrollably
leave her there forgotten to
sneak up on your
next vulnerable victim
with your beautiful yet
deceiving green eyes
that hide all your dangers


The author's comments:
advice is loved! thank you

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This article has 13 comments.


on Aug. 8 2010 at 10:58 pm
Boosflash DIAMOND, Papillion, Nebraska
55 articles 0 photos 2066 comments

Favorite Quote:
What the front door.

you dont need advice, you need to do your dance and write more stuff like this. I love how you started it off "you play the game well", very smooth. 5 stars captain.

on Apr. 28 2010 at 10:11 pm
xBaByGiRrL22x PLATINUM, Pearl River, New York
22 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The goal isn't to live forever, but create something that will."
"If you wanna go, baby let's go; if you wanna rock, I'm ready to roll.''
"No one ever said it'd be easy. They just said it'd be worth it." <3

wow. this is really good. it sets things into a real perspective that im sure many girls can relate. i also kno someone like this. luv it!

on Apr. 28 2010 at 9:19 pm
Jade-McKaye SILVER, West Jordan, Utah
9 articles 0 photos 37 comments

Favorite Quote:
what happened to a dream?

this is soo good!

on Apr. 28 2010 at 2:59 pm
MeganAnne PLATINUM, Niskayuna, New York
24 articles 0 photos 157 comments

Favorite Quote:
All my life I've looked at words as if I were seeing them for the first time. ~Ernest Hemingway

i really loved this! it was soo good and shone true to how many girls feel. great job! keep writing.

on Feb. 13 2010 at 7:10 pm
brainiac SILVER, Grove City, Ohio
8 articles 1 photo 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
Time keeps on slipping, slipping, slipping into the future.

It's vivid and a little creepy. Awesome!

KaitlynC GOLD said...
on Feb. 13 2010 at 9:53 am
KaitlynC GOLD, Oneonta, New York
16 articles 1 photo 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"when i met you i fell in love and you smiled because you knew" ~William Shakespear

veryy veryy good...i know how you feel...keep up the good work hun

on Nov. 22 2009 at 12:46 pm
ChasingWildFlowers BRONZE, Miamisburg, Ohio
2 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Good health is merely the slowest rate at which we can die."

That was amazing. Very relatable. Keep writing. (:

on Nov. 18 2009 at 8:45 pm
lexikeys247 SILVER, Forks, Washington
7 articles 0 photos 23 comments
hey! thank you so much for the compliments! ill be sure to check your work out also!

Bex24 BRONZE said...
on Oct. 18 2009 at 8:28 pm
Bex24 BRONZE, Toronto, Other
3 articles 21 photos 79 comments
The flow of this piece is so well-paced! Really good job. It reminds me a lot of my short story that was published in Teen Ink, "Green-Grey." Check it out and you'll get the same vibe, I think. I also really like the last bit, "...deceiving green eyes/that hide all your dangers." So beautiful!

on Aug. 19 2009 at 9:42 pm
Robsessed PLATINUM, McKinney, Texas
23 articles 1 photo 199 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I may be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it." - Maya Angelou

"Did you know 'I told you so' has a brother, Jacob?" she asked cutting me off. "His name is 'Shut the hell up.'" - Bella Swan, Breaking Dawn

The alliteration was nice and each line ended with a finite word, which made it more powerful to me. Seeing as how my user name is Robsessed and you live in Forks, I have to ask if you like the Twilight Saga?

on Jul. 26 2009 at 2:26 am
MorningStar15 DIAMOND, Orange, Vermont
71 articles 2 photos 179 comments
loved it

PK4evr ELITE said...
on Jun. 4 2009 at 2:23 pm
PK4evr ELITE, Allen, Texas
105 articles 5 photos 107 comments

Favorite Quote:
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch everyone wonder how you did it!

Nice imagry there :). And thanks for your comments on my pimples and life :P

fukuhara said...
on Mar. 20 2009 at 4:30 am
nice alliteration, i like the flow