loving you is not quite love
but this feeling is too strong
to be something as dull as
“liking him”.

(“so you like him?”
“yeah, I like him.”)

potential (adj.): possible, capable of
being or becoming.

loving you is potentially love
and potentially hate.
loving you is potentially love
and potentially hate.

loving you is like being
punched in the stomach with
a smile on my face and
a kiss on my lips.

loving you is listening to
every song to find a
glimpse of you there,
in intricate melodies
and meaningful lyrics.

loving you is pretending
you are mine when you are not
and trying to figure out
if I really love you or not.

loving you is drowning.

drowning is sometimes pleasant,
all green seas and
honey in my lungs.

and sometimes it is awful, like
angry gray skies and the persistent thoughts
of “not good enough, not pretty enough,
just shut up, just stop talking”—

your hand would be lovely in mine, my dear.