The unthinkable had happened.
I had done it.
Everyone says that you can't be best friends
with the opposite sex
without falling in love.
Without falling for them.
I had thought it possible.
I take it back.
It happened.
I fell for him.
That boy,
the kind one,
the funny one.
He makes me laugh,
he understands me,
he loves me...
Like a brother.
To him,
I am a little sister,
the one that needs him,
that wants him.
But I can't break his brotherly love
with something that will never come true.
I fell in love with him,
and he doesn't know.
He thinks that when I say I love you back to him,
it's sisterly love.
It isn't.
It's everything a sister shouldn't say
to her brother.
But he doesn't know.
And he will never find out.
I can't tell him.
I don't want to lose my brother because I told him
the truth.
That I fell in love.
With him.
Completely.
Head over heels.
His laugh,
his smile,
the way he hugs me automatically when he sees me,
how he doesn't shy away from me holding his hand,
when I need to,
or squeezing the life out of him
with a giant hug.
I can tell him anything,
and I tell him everything.
Everything except that I fell in love.
That I fell for him.
For that crazy boy,
with the red hair,
and the ratty tennis shoes.
The boy that listens to music I've never even heard of,
and gets me into stuff I never thought I would like.
That hands over his phone when I ask,
no questions asked.
He's my phone wallpaper,
my computer screen saver,
but he doesn't know.
He's in my head and my heart,
and my social network picture.
My most favorite person in the world.
The boy that always has on a green shirt,
and never smiles,
unless he's with me,
his little sister,
the girl that's secretly in love with him.
It's so hard not to spill,
to tell him everything,
but I'm afraid.
Afraid of rejection,
and of losing the one person in the world that
knows how to make me feel better,
that can tell when I don't feel good
after I only say one word,
my best friend.
But everyone says you can't be best friends with
the opposite sex,
it's true.
I fell in love with my best friend.
My brother.
But I can't lose him,
I need him.
So he will never know.