Once upon a time there was a princess so fair,

And all the land loved her, for her and her pink hair.

One night she went out to a friend’s birthday party,

And there she got just a little bit rowdy.

She met a prince with nice blue eyes,

Oh my god, she thought she would die.

They talked and talked about ObamaCare.

Then, the prince knew they were going to be a pair.

At midnight the princess had to go home,

So she called Uber and left all alone.

But there,

On a chair,

She had left her Louis Vuitton backpack,

And of course, beside it, her Obey snapback.

The prince thought that she was a stunner,

The problem was, he didn’t have her number.

With her personal belongings in hand,

He searched for her all throughout the land.

When at last he found her, checking her Instagram.

And he thought to himself: “Wait, I don’t need a girlfriend, I have Netflix.”