Dear Future Princes,

“A gentleman is not defined by the content of his wallet or the cut of his suit. He is defined by his manners and the content of his character,” says anonymous. There are a lot of men in the world, but very few are true gentlemen. In this letter, I will give you some tips and examples from Kit, the prince, from the movie Cinderella on how to act more like a gentleman and win the heart of a real lady.

Pursue her. The definition of pursue is to “seek to attain or accomplish (a goal) especially over a long period.” If you are interested in getting to know a lovely lady on a deeper level, heading toward marriage, you have to be intentional through your words and your actions. Be honest about where you see the relationship headed, or where you want the relationship to go in the future. Please do not leave her confused about where the relationship stands. If you are a true man of chivalry, you will be open and honest with not just her, but her parents as well. Although it may seem a bit old fashioned to ask her father’s permission to go out with her, this will leave a respectable first impression with her parents. And trust me, first impressions are everything. Strong relationships always involve honesty between both individuals. Honesty is always the best policy.

“Punctuality is the politeness of princes.” This is incredibly important. There is nothing more aggravating than an unreliable guy. If you make a commitment, stay true to your word, and make sure you stick to it. Reliability is an important character quality to possess. If you mention the idea of going out on a date, let that not be a daydream you had, but instead make it a plan and follow through with it. Actions speak much louder than words.

“Eye contact is a dangerous thing, but lovely, oh so lovely” says an anonymous online source. Gentleman, if you are set on winning a girls’ heart, you must know how to communicate. You must first become an expert in eye contact. In order to carry on a conversation, and do it well, it starts with impeccable skill in eye contact. Make sure you are looking deeply into her eyes, by fixing your glance upon her. This will let her know that you are listening to her and care for her feelings. Don’t make it too awkward of course; you’ll want to blink every once in a while to make it not seem too obvious. A lack of eye contact shows insecurity and that you are not confident in yourself or what you are saying. Become an expert in this area, and you are sure to captivate the heart of your girl.

You MUST be a good dancer. As women, we like our men to be sophisticated, well-rounded individuals. You’ve gotta have that fancy footwork in order to impress us ladies. But what about asking a girl to slow dance? That’s a different story, and it can be a bit intimidating from what I’ve heard. First things first…. begin by approaching her, not too quickly as to fall flat on your face (making sure to keep eye contact). Now, about asking her how to dance: there is no particular way to ask her, but I thought Kit’s invitation was quite charming. He asked Cinderella by saying, “If I may, that is, it would give me the greatest pleasure if you would do me the honor of letting me lead you through this…the first…” (I think he may have gotten a bit nervous here, because he forgot the last word) “…dance?” Cinderella finishes. Once she agrees to dance with you, place your right hand around her waist. Then, take her right hand and place it in your left. This isn’t rocket science; it’s really not complicated. After the dance is over, make sure to let her know that you enjoyed every moment and don’t forget to invite her to take a romantic stroll through the scenic gardens under the moonlit sky. This will earn you MAJOR brownie points.

Learn how to give compliments, and learn to give them well.  When Cinderella and Kit started dancing, she says, “They’re all looking at you”, and Kit responds, “Believe me, they’re all looking at you.” Smoooth, right? Notice what he did there? He twisted the compliment she gave him in order to compliment her instead. If you want to score extra brownie points with the ladies, always give a nice compliment. This does not mean classic pickup lines such as “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” Trust me that one never ends well. I’m pretty sure Satan fell from heaven. That one could easily backfire on you. Avoid the cheesy pickup lines at all cost.

True gentlemen look beyond the outward appearance and focus on the heart. Now I know that physical appearance does play a role in whether you are interested in an individual or not, but hear me out. It’s not all about the looks. A girl could appear to have everything from the outside and still have a dirty heart on the inside. 1 Samuel 16:7 says, “For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” After Kit first met Cinderella in the forest, he was speaking to his father about the mystery girl he could not stop thinking about. He mentioned, “her spirit, her goodness” and how “there was so much more to her.” Notice, he didn’t dwell on her outward beauty, but found her heart to be the most beautiful. The heart after all, is the most beautiful.

These are many of the outstanding character qualities that we ladies look for in a guy. Although at times it may feel like there are no more gentleman to be found in the world, I have faith that they are still out there. So gentleman, take heed of my advice, lest you be single the rest of your life.