It was her 21st birthday. She was in Chicago, at one of the best clubs. She should be having the time of her life. Yet, she found herself tiring of the night already. She may be 21 now but that didn’t mean she was interesting in trashing herself, like many friend had already taken to so fondly. As she stood alone in the bathroom, she argued with herself about whether to leave and go home. She paced for a while until she finally decided, Oh what the heck, she thought, I’m not even enjoying myself anymore, all my friends are completely wasted and all the guys want to do is find a way to get me home with them ASAP I might as well walk home.With that she stormed out and as she was walking down the sidewalk toward home, she ran straight into a guy wwith a soaking wet white T- shirt.
“Whoa,” he said, “Excuse me.”
As she caught her bearings she could only stare. Here she was, on the late but bright streets of the busy city of Chicago and there was a guy practically shirtless and giving her a dazzling smile as she stood and stared. Say something, anything she thought. Yet she couldn’t think of anything and his smile slowly melted into a quizzical frown
“Are you okay?” he asked and finally something in her brain lit up.
“Oh, oh yes fine! Just, uh, a little off balance. I just came out of the club. But I’m not drunk or anything, even though I could if I wanted cuz s I am 21 but I didn’t really want to do that…” she trailed off as she realized she was babbling. She finally finished with, “and yeah I was just in a hurry to get home.”
“Oh, well here’s your phone. I think it’s ok, just a little scratched up,” he said as he handed her the phone. She hadn’t even noticed she’d dropped it.
“Oh thank you!” She waited a few moments then held out her hand and said “I’m Chloe Dixon,”
“Will Vaughn.” He said and as she shook his hand she felt shivers go through her, a feeling hse hadn’t felt since highschool.
“Since I rudely can into you and nearly caused you to break your phone, mind if I walk you home to make sure no other guys run you over?” He said this with the most irrestible smile on his face.
She smiled and said “ I’d like that. Maybe you can entertain with the reason your shirt is wet?
“Oh, that is a story…” he said
They walked home together that night talking and getting to know eachother. He asked her out that night and a year and a half later they were engaged.

Chloe rolled over in bed and leaned over to kiss Will when the alarm went off. He stretched and rolled over. When saw her leaning over him on her elbow he smiled and said,
“Happy Birthday...”
“Hi,” she said.
“So… you’ll let me pick you up from work tonight. For your surprise?” he asked.
“Yeah… for sure tonight? No matter what?” she asked hesitantly.
“I promise.” And with that he gave her a quick kiss and jumped out of bed before she could reach out to him or kiss him back. Emptiness again.

Mornings left little time for bonding and for little else than pleasantries. Will was a lawyer and his phone was often ringing soon after he got up, with calls from his secretary, clients, and the list could go on and on. He was often out the door by 7:30, leaving Chloe to eat breakfast alone. However, this morning was different. Because he was picking her up, he had to drive her to work. Chloe was a pediatric dental hygienist. She brought little work home with her, unlike Will with his briefcase, laptop, and cell phone that he never turned off. She loved him, but sometimes to her it felt like he was married to his job instead of her. This morning was a busy morning for him and he was on the phone a good portion of the ride together. When they arrived at the office she waited for his call to end and turned to him to ask,
“So you’ll be her at 5pm, no matter what?”
“Chloe, I’ll be here if the sky is falling,” he said and smiled the same smile he’d given her when they’d met. The one that made her melt and believe anything he said.
“O.K., “she said, “I love you.”
“Baby, I love you more. I’ll see you at 5:00.” He said then kissed her
With that she got out of the car hopeful it was true.

At 11 a.m. the phone rang, as she was busy administering fluoride to a nine year old girl. And moments later the secretary and a good friend of hers came back to the office and said,
“Chloe, Will’s on the phone.”
“Will?” Chloe said, “What could he possibly be calling for?”Although she had an idea, she asked not wanting to believe he could be calling for the reason she was thinking. She finished up with the girl, called the dentist in and went to the vacant back office’s phone.
“it’s Chloe,” she said
“Chloe…” he said, then sighed, All it took was the one word and she knew.
“Don’t say it, don’t,” she said
“Chloe, I’m sorry but I have to go on a last minute business trip tonight. There’s a special case in Seattle and I have to go for a couple nights,”
“Will, you promised,” she felt tears in her eyes but refused to let them fall now. Then she said quietly, “The sky isn’t even falling,”
“I know, honey… I am so sorry, I am. I just-”
“Don’t,” she interrupted “It isn’t like this is the first time you’ve done this. I’m done with it Will! I count on you and I believe you, and you let me down every single time! And you’re my husband! I should be able to trust you no matter what! You should be here I need you!”
It was quiet for a moment, then Will said, “Chloe, I love you. I’m sorry.”
“It’s not enough,” she said, sadly. And on that note, she hung up the phone

The end of the day rolled around and she realized she was without a ride home. Walking home will be therapeutic anyway and give me time to think clearly she decided. It wasn’t just that he’d broken off plans on her birthday, for work that bothered her. It was that and all the other times. But what hurt most of all was that he had broken the promise, every promise, he’d made to her when he’d asked her to marry him.

It was New Year’s Eve and Chloe was 22. She and Will were in Montana visiting his family. On that night he took her up to the mountains, telling her what a wonderful place it would be to start the New Year. When they reached a spot where there was a plaque, which told the historical significance, and a people could get out of their car and look over the edge and the world below, he stopped the car.
“C’mon” Will said excitedly, as he began to get out of the car.
“What?” Chloe asked in surprise.

“Get out. I’ve got a surprise.”
“Will, it’s freezing out there!”
“Trust me, it’s worth it.” He said and then flshedher his dazzling smile and she relented. When she was out, she walked over to stand by him. He smiled and leaned into the truck to turn the music up.
Chloe listened then said, “This is one of my favorite songs!”
He smiled again then handed her a CD case. It was a mix of all her favorite songs.
“Happy New Year.” Will said.
“Will… I don’t need any gifts for New Year’s”
He shrugged and said “You get one anyway.”
“But I don’t have anything to give you.”
“Yes you do,” and then he leaned into the truck, changed the song to a slow one. Then he held out his hand.She took his hand and the two walked a little farther from the road. Although neither said anything they began to dance. At that moment, she knew there would never be another dance like it. Every star shone bright above and scattered lights from homes and cars shone below. The moon was nearly full and the surrounding mountains and trees were covered with newly fallen snow. They danced in silence for the whole song when the next one started up, he pulled back, got down on his knee in the snow, and pulled out a ring.
“Chloe, I love you. I want to make you the happiest person on earth. You are beautiful, smart, kind. You’re better to me than I’ll ever deserve. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted. Ifyou marry me, I promise to love every day. I will be there for you and I’ll never let you down. I will be everything you need and want. Will you marry me?”
As Will said this, it was everything she needed to hear. She loved him and he loved her and what could she say but “Yes, I will marry you.”

As she walked remembering this moment, she heard a voice call her name. She turned and saw
“Connor?!” her high school sweetheart.
“Chloe! Hey! Wow, you look great!,” he said as he hugged her. “I can’t believe I’m running into you here in Chicago. Do you live here?”
“Yeah, in a little suburbia not far from here. You?”
“Actually I just moved here. I got a job for the Chicago Sun- Times,”
“That’s great! Good for you.”
“Yeah… you walking home, alone? I’ll give you a ride home if you want.”
“Uh… sure yeah. Why not? It’ll give us a chance to catch up”\
As they walked toward his car he asked “So what’s going on in your life?’
“Well, I’m dental hygienist at a pediatric clinic.”
“Really? I never that expected that from you…” he said with a mischievous smile.
“Oh no?” she asked smiling back
“Well you always talked about Vegas…” then he laughed and said “just kidding!”
She laughed and hit him playfully in the shoulder as she said “oh, jeez! Your never gonna let that go are you?”
“Nope,” he said and smiled
As they drove home, they traded questions about their careers, their family, and finally the inevitable: “So, Chloe are you married?”
She knew the question was coming. Had it been any other day she wold have said yes, his name is Will and I love him very much. However, after everything she couldn’t bring herself to say the words. She just couldn’t. Her husband was a plane, getting farther away by the minute and he high school sweetheart, her first love, was standing in front of her.
“No,” she said as she discreetly removed her wedding ring from her hand, “I’m not.”
As they stopped at her house he said” Well then, since it’s your birthday, mind if I come by at eight and take you dinner?”
And after a moment she said “I’d love to.”

She walked into her house at 6:30 with an hour and a half to get ready. However, she couldn’t bring herself to do anything but sit on the bed and stare at the ring in her hand. The one she’d slipped off as covertly as possible. She hadn’t taken it off since the day they’d been married. Not once. But she pushed away the inkling of guilt down and sat thinking. It’s not as if he doesn’t deserve this. I have been faithful in every way possible, while his is half the man I married. This date was her way of getting back at him, in her own passive aggressive way. And also her way of deciding whether or not she really could stay with Will forever.After all, she thought, if he can’t give me the one thing I want more than anything, how can I stay?

Will and Chloe had been married for a year when she’d finally brought up the subject of children. They were lying in bed, cuddling up, as the credits to the movie they’d been watching rolled by.
“So, Will?”
“Yeah?”
“Well…you see we’ve got a nice house and I don’t see any marital problems in the near future and we’ve been married a year, so… what do you think about maybe trying for a baby?”
They were both sitting up now, and Will was looking at her with a very serious expression look on his face, as he sat in silence.
“Will,” she said with concern, “You do want children don’t you?”
“Of course… I just don’t know if now a good time…” he said.
“Well a baby wouldn’t be here for nine months.”
“I know,” he said with trepidation, “but I think we should wait for me to complete my law degree. And you’re just getting settled in your job. I think we should wait until we’re settled down is all.”
This disappointed her but it made sense… that time. However, as time went on, he found more excuses to not have a baby and took every precaution to make sure it didn’t happen as a happy surprise. But he made a promise every time, soon as soon as possible. Yet he insisted he wanted children. But… there was always a “but”. Overtime it became such a strain on the she’d stopped bringing up, but still wanted. Will wasn’t keeping his promises and she wasn’t sure how much longer she could take it.

She put the ring on the coffee table and looked at the time. 7:00 p.m. Connor would be there in one hour. No time to shower she thought. She went into the bathroom, ignoring any evidence of Will as well as she could, as she tried to decide what to do with her hair. Will likes it curly best she thought before she could stop herself. What does Connor like? She asked herself but couldn’t remember so she decided to curl it. When she was done, she went to her closet to pick an outfit. After staring for what she knew was too much time, she finally chose the black strapless dress, black pumps, and the diamond earings. As she put the second earring in she realized they had been a second anniversary gift from Will when he hadn’t been able to make dinner. This memory pushed any guilt she may have been feeling over the date away. As she looked in the mirror to see her self in full view she realized she was wearing everything Will liked best. Good she thought he deserves to miss this. Then the doorbell rang. She went to the door and Connor said
“Ready?’
Ready for payback? Yes,she thought, ready to betray? She didn’t answer that question. She merely smiled and walked out the door.

He took her to a nice resturaunt in the downtown part of Chicago. After they’d been seated and ordered their drinks, Connor asked, “So, why didn’t you have plans on your birthday? Your golden one none the less…”
“Oh… well my best friend made some plans but at the last minute decided to do something more important. Their loss,” she said and smiled flirtatiously. He smiled back and the conversation fell back into a comfortable place, such as high school memories. Connor had just reached out to hold her hand when her phone rang. It was Will. She stared at the phone, silently debating whether to answer. She pushed ingnore.
“Sorry,” she said “You were saying?” Connor looked at her concerned and asked,
“Are you ok? You got a look on your face. The same one you used to get when I’d make you mad.”
“Oh yeah, that… just a friend. The same one that blew me off. They’re always promising me one thing, blowing me off, then apoligizing. I just didn’t feel like hearing it now.” She gave a small smile and looked down. Connor gave her an encouraging smile, then told her sweetly,
“Well, I’m here.” They looked at each other and he slowly moved toward her and kissed her.

They left the resturant soon after the kiss and he brought her home and walked her to the door.
“I had a nice time Chloe. I never realized how much I missed you.”
“Yeah thanks for not letting me spend my birhtday alone. It means a lot.”
“Sure, anytime.” It was quiet, a kind of awkward silence. Then he leaned in to kiss her. But this time passionately. For him, it was the passion you had when you were with your first love. For Chloe, it was everything she’d wanted from Will: To feel wanted more than air itself, something she hadn’t felt with Will for years. The kissing didn’t stop at the door. They walked in and continued kissing as she made her way across the room to turn the radio on. As they made their way to the couch, shirts began to come off. As they kissed, a song came on the radio, the same one she and Will had danced to in the know all those years ago. It was then, in Connor’s embrace she realized: it wasn’t just anyone’s love she wanted, but Will’s. She wanted Will to pull her into his arms and hold her for as possible. And she couldn’t go through with what was about to happen knowing this. She loved Will and hurting him wouldn’t solve their problems. She pulled back from Connor and said, “Stop, we have to stop.” She stood up and pulled her dress all the way back on.
“Chloe, what’s wrong?” he asked. He looked worried. He couldn’t imagine what would make her pull back. She took a deep breath and said, “Connor, I’m married.”
He purely looked at her moment then said, “You’rewhat?!”
“Married. For five years now.”
“Well, uh, why didn’t you say when I asked if you were married?”
“Because I didn’t want to be,” she sighed then said, “The sorry I told you about the friend who blew me off? That is my husband. He blew me off when he promised he wouldn’t. He has been breaking every promise he made to me when he asked me to marry him. And I wanted… wanted him hurt like he has hurt me. But I just realized I can’t. I love him and as many problems as we may have right now, I can’t let go of him or hurt him. And I’m sorry Connor, if I’ve hurt at all in this. It ‘s the last thing I wanted.”
He looked at her and took a deep breath. He stood up and just looked at her a second. Then he said, “Chloe, I’ve always loved you. And I’ve always thought about getting back together with you. I’d be happy if you wanted me, because you’re amazing. But if there is one thing you deserve, it’s to be with who you love. And right now, it’s not me. And I don’t just say that because of your confession, but because I could sense it, something… distant. You’ve never been a great liar,” he sighed then said, “So I’m gonna leave before we do something we both regret. And I hope your husband wakes up and realizes what he losing.” Then he walked over and put his hand to cheek.
“Love isn’t easy Chloe,” he said, “It’s something to work at. And something tells me this guywants tobe here for you. Why wouldn’t he? Something is just holding him back. Figure that out and things will be better.”
She had tears in her eyes for too many reasons for her to understand. But she managed to say,
“Thank you.” Connor nodded, kissed her forehead and said, “Good-bye Chloe. I hope youfind what you need.”
“Bye.” she said.

She laid in bed that night, not sleeping for most the night, but thinking. She loved Will and Connor leaving was really what was best. And his words rang in her head. He wants to give you what you want, something is holding him back. Could that be true she tought and if it is what could it possibly be? These question were ringing through her head when her phone vibrated
Text Message: My Love Will…She opened the message and it read :I’ll be home tomorrow evening. I love you…He’ll be home tomorrow she thought. And I’ll talk to him, until then… and she finnally fell asleep.

She spent the whole next day merely going through the motions. She couldn’t stop thinking about everything: Will, Connor, what Connor said, what Will promised and what she’d say to Will when he came home.She didn’t know what time Will would be home. So she sat on the couch waiting for him. What she planned to say to him changed throughout the day, in sync with her feelings. Sometimes she was angry at Will, sometimes she was guilty, and sometimes both. When Will walked in at 7:41 p.m. she was feeling both. He put his bag down and walked over to her. She stood and walked a few steps toward him arms crossed.
“Hi,” he said
“Hi,” she replied, automatically. There was an awkward silence, when finally Will spoke.
“Chloe, look about what happened between us-”
“Will, before you tell me how sorry you are, again, I have something to tell you. I think you should know. Not necessarily because you deserve it but because it’s what’s fair and I’d want to know, if it was me.”
“What?” he said hesitantly
“The simplest way to say it? I kind of cheated on you, while you were gone. I really am sorry.”
“You- what?! And how do you kind of cheat?” Will said, his voice shaking.
“I ran into my ex-boyfriend Connor. We talked and he took me to dinner. I didn’t mention I was married because I was so mad at you. After dinner we came back here and made out. I stopped before it got too far.”
“Again, specify kind of cheat.”
“We just made out and stuff. Nothing major, but still ….”
Will scoffed and ran his hand through his hand through his hair as he paced. Well she thoughtsadly it worked. I hurt him. He stopped pacing and took deep breaths. Then he said,
“Chloe, why? Why would you do that? You’re not… that kind of person!”
Then she felt just purely angry again. “How can you ask why Will? I’m not saying I was justified but I don’t know how you can look me in the eye and ask why!”
“Chloe! I mean I know I let you down on your birthday and it upset you but why would you-”
“Ugh! No Will you’re not getting it! It’s not just this one time! It’s all the timesyou promised, you swore. And every time you break your promise! You find something more important, then me, your wife! And every time you break the promise you made to me the day you asked me to marry you: to be what I need and never let me down. You’re not making me happy, Will. You don’t give me what I need and I need you! I love you…”
Tears fell at the end of her rant and she wiped them away quickly. Will looked at her with shock and remorse.
“Chloe I’m sorry. I-I work a lot to give you what you deserve out of life. But don’t you think I feel horrible when I let you down? You think I wanted to be in Seattle instead of with you? I love you Chloe, more than anything.”
Will looked at her, as if begging her to let it go, to forgive him. But she couldn’t, not yet. She shook her head and said, “ It’s not enough…”
“Jeez, Chloe! What do you want from me? I’m sorry I’ve let you down and I’m sorry I’ve let you down and I’m sorry I’m not here for you. I didn’t know I was hurting you so much. I will do everything to change. I mean it this time! What more can I say?”
He said everything she wanted to hear, yet there was one other problem. She knew why it wasn’t enough.
“A baby. I want a baby.” She said sadly but determinedly.
He was quiet for a moment, then said, “What?”
“You heard me,” she said, “I want a baby. It’s not news.” Will started to say something when she stopped him. “And don’t give me some excuse like you have for the last four years. You want to give me what I need? You want me to be happier? You have known for some time that I want this yet, you keep refusing and promising ‘later, for sure’. But like everything it never happens.”
She looked at him as she said this. He was looking away by the end, arms crossed, but she swore she saw tears in his eyes. She moved closer and said, “PleaseWill, just tell me why. Please…”
Just as her hand was about to touch his cheek, he pulled away and said, “I need to go on a walk.” And he turned toward the door.
“Will-”
“No, Chloe, I’ll be back. But I really need to just think. Please just…” he sighed then said, “I’ll be back… I promise.” Then he was gone. When the door was closed she burst into tears, not caring whether he heard her or not.

She’d gone to bed, when and how she couldn’t really remember. At midnight, she heard the door open. She heard Will’s footsteps come to the opening of the doorway of their bedroom and stop. After what felt like forever, she heard him remove his shoes and then get on the bed.

“Chloe, are you awake?” Will whispered. She stayed silent but he kept talking.
“Chloe, I’m so sorry I messed up. My greatest nightmare is losing you. I didn’t know I was pushing you away. And I understand why you did what you did. You needed someone; you wanted someone to be there for you. I get it… and you wanted to hurt me. I would too.”
She didn’t know if he knew she was awake, but she stayed silent, realizing silence was what he needed, to say what he wanted to.
And the baby thing… it’s not what you think. I want kids. But your right about the fact that I have been making excuses. The real reason? I’m afraid. Not of parenthood exactly… just of becoming just like my own father.”
She heard his voice break a little and he took a deep breath. She stayed silent.
“He was never there for me as a kid, always gone for work. And when he was home he was distant. Around only to make sure I stayed in line for my mom, got good grades and became a man. I barely knew him. When he died, the only sadness I felt was over the fact that I really would never get to know him. I don’t want my children to have a father like that.” He was silent for a moment then he said, “I want to change and I will. For you… and any baby. I’ll be here for you. I want to make you my first priority. You might wonder what makes this any different from my other promises, all the ones I broke. You don’t know it’s different yet. But you will. I love you Chloe.” Then he leaned over and kissed her cheek, as tenderly and lovingly as possible. She turned over then and saw the tears in his eyes and she felt the ones in hers. It was quiet, until she said, “I’m sorry. I love you.”
“I love you more,” he said. “And I’ll prove it.”
“Oh really?” she said playfully.
“You really want a baby?”
Chloe said nothing back, but smiled and kissed him passionately, knowing this time his words were true.

“It’s a girl,” Will said as he held the newborn in his arms.
“A beautiful girl,” Chloe corrected him, breathlessly but playfully. She smiled as Will handed her their child.
As Chloe looked at her child and her husband she couldn’t believe how far she and Will had come in the last 9 months. Will had kept his promise. Although his job was still time consuming, he kept every promise of being there for her. He was there on every prenatal visit, on their anniversary, and gave a meeting to be at her side for the 2 week early birth. They were happy. Happier than they could ever be. When it came time to give the name for the birth certificate, they both knew what name, out of the many they’d considered, was perfect.
“Faith,” they said together.
Faith was more than just a pretty name to them. Their daughter represented something: you can’t let fear and excuses take you over. If you do, it can tear apart everything that means anything to you. Sometimes you have to take a leap of faith and trust in love you have and that the one you love returns it.
“Faith,” the nurse said, “A beautiful name,”
Yes, Chloe thought, as she looked at her husband and baby she had because of him, what a beautiful and wonderful thing.