As I write this, I am trying to accurately express the emotions that I experience into a language that can be understood by someone other than myself. Sometimes I find my mind wondering about how the world as I know it came to be. The sheer thought that everything that I know in the world came from nothing is an incredible concept that I do not think I will ever be able to grasp completely. Whenever I meditate on these thoughts, intense emotions of longing are stirred up within me. Also anxiety regarding what the future holds for me and the rest of this world. I think back to when I was younger, I would see something in a store that I wanted more than anything else. It would constantly be on my mind until I was able to obtain it or until I found something to distract me. The feelings that I experienced years back under those circumstances are similar to the emotions that I experience when asking these meaningful questions about life.

What is the meaning of life? I go through the same motions each and every day of each and every week and I will most likely continue to do so for the remainder of my life. There are some days that I wake up wanting more, a purpose. I want to be sure about why I exist and who put me here, but I am afraid I never will. I try to latch on to Christianity but I find that so much of the religion is based on blind faith. Faith is something that I have very little of, I am the type of person that needs all of the facts in front of me to believe in something. There is no science behind any religions which frustrates me more than anything. I refuse however to believe that I have no purpose other than to live on the earth and then simply cease to exist after a short number of years. I know that there is something more to life, I just don’t know what.