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The Whole
“The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.” - Aristotle
Among my friends, I am labeled as the spontaneous, humorous, cheerful one. My positivity didn't arise from a happy upbringing; contrarily, my optimism was born from the turmoil of my past.
My parents have high expectations for me, especially since I am their only child.
My younger self couldn't take the pressure. I was filled with insecurities and often suffered bouts of abjection. My greatest fear was never reaching my parents' rising expectations, which in my naive state of mind was the equivalent of never attaining their love.
This self-loathing began to crumble in eighth grade when news came that a former student at our school had passed away. The boy's father had shot him and the rest of the family, then later took his own life. Ironically, this tragedy began my healing. When I heard the father had suffered from depression and anxiety, I thought, "Could that have been me?" and I contemplated what my parents meant to me. Their words and actions were often hurtful, but my parents were motivated by love. They had only one chance to raise me; they felt they couldn't afford to spoil me with what they deemed as useless kindness. I thought about all my parents had done for me and how much I loved them.
Consequently, I have learned to accept myself and do things for me, not my parents. It became easier to accomplish my goals without the threat of rejection hanging over my head. I appreciate my friends and family because I cannot take it for granted that they will always be with me. This mentality has compelled me to treasure these people and do everything I can to bring them happiness through my own positivity. Forged from challenging experiences, my new philosophy on family and friends has made me complete.
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