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Surgeon General's Warning MAG
August 23, 2008
You smell like smoke.
Not the good, grandfather kind that wraps
around me like a hand-me-down
scarf and sinks
into my skin like stories
(those fairy tales you used to mumble,
sneakily replacing knights in armor with you
and your messy smile)
It creeps off you in waves that crawl
up my nose
and claw at my brain until
my face screws into a grimace and I have
to turn away
so you don’t leave me for being ugly.
Cigarettes will kill you.
© Anonymous
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 29 comments.
littleleyah SILVER said...
on Jun. 7 2010 at 8:00 pm
everyone please read my work and comment too! many thank yous!
toxic.monkey SILVER said...
on Feb. 17 2010 at 10:03 am
yeah smoking is bad... what really sucks, is if you've had one, you want more for years after. trust me :P
doppingjoh said...
on Jan. 4 2010 at 3:21 pm
This really makes you think
the author said...
on Dec. 24 2009 at 6:57 pm
ha, I'm not condemning smokers. It's a character study. lordy
Travis121490 SILVER said...
on Oct. 30 2009 at 10:25 pm
And I had no idea there was a form of suicide that was exciting...I'm with ashley there are a lot of things out there that are bad for you but you still do it beacuse you like it.
FlyleafFreak DIAMOND said...
on Oct. 8 2009 at 5:27 pm
Wow! This was amazing and so true. Every smoker should have a chance to read this. In response to ashleys comment, maybe if you actually thought deeper about the poem, you would get what they are saying.
ashley said...
on Oct. 8 2009 at 11:20 am
yep, but some people like to do it!
Phantom_Girl GOLD said...
on Oct. 7 2009 at 3:27 pm
Too true. Too true.
jmc.13 said...
on Sep. 16 2009 at 4:48 pm
Really good. Loved it! Smoking is the most boring form of suicide.
Weatherly said...
on May. 15 2009 at 4:52 pm
thanks guys- the encouragement is great. :)
one_of_a_kind_girl GOLD said...
on May. 9 2009 at 3:12 pm
looooooooove it
blackamethyst GOLD said...
on Apr. 22 2009 at 10:13 pm
I really like this poem... I can relate, too. please keep writing :)
BrokenSociety said...
on Jan. 29 2009 at 1:36 pm
I love it. I smoke <_< and the smell ain't all that great. Despite what the other viewers say, the last line is good and DEFINATLY nessicary. It makes the poem alive. Great job hon.
AndThisIsReal said...
on Jan. 5 2009 at 3:40 pm
Hmmmmmm. Yes, I would have to agree the last line is a bit abrupt and does and does disturb the flow some, but it also takes you by suprise, and conveys the message very straight forward while also summing it up, while the rest of the poem dances around the message.
Overall I really like this.
Overall I really like this.
euagak said...
on Dec. 16 2008 at 6:11 pm
I really like the abrupt ending. In reality most things don't end slowly and sweetly. They end abruptly if they actually do end. It is good when poetry conveys this. You have great imagery and really convey the smell to the reader.
Redemption65 said...
on Dec. 15 2008 at 12:55 am
I don't get what is happening here. Is the guy describing the smoke, or is he longing for it? This does not at all make sense.
penguinlover said...
on Dec. 5 2008 at 3:11 am
I liked your poem. I disagree with the other reviewers. I liked the last sentence. Maybe you could just add a little more detail to it? You use excellent imagery throughout the poem and I think you could add it to the "Ciggarates will kill you". Maybe the grandfather could be on his deathbed as the character describes the smoke? I really liked it and thought your poem gave off a good message.
the candyman said...
on Dec. 2 2008 at 6:48 pm
good stuff right there. ;)
3 articles 0 photos 278 comments
Favorite Quote:
"It's always darkest before the dawn." ~Florence and the Machine
Short and sweet but it says everything it needs to.... I LOVE IT!!! <3 <3 <3 God Job!