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Invitation to Disaster
As I walk back inside the house from getting the mail I begin shuffling through all the envelopes in search for the monthly rent when all of a sudden a particular one stood out to me. Luckily it wasn’t the rent since I wasn’t able to pay it this month. It was an envelope that read “invitation.” I quickly gathered my family into the living room to ask if they knew anything about it, they all replied to no. I figured, they all suck. As I open the envelope it reads “Congratulations, you and your family are cordially invited to a gala dinner in your honor.” They were all shocked, I was not. I have been expecting something like this although I had no reason to. None of us had any idea what this was about, and when we took a look at the address, it was a place we had never heard of before, much like UofA. We discussed as a family if it was all a scam or what not but in the end we decided to go and see what it was all about. Our bags are now packed, we get in the car, start it up and head out.
It was a far drive, maybe two or three hours long. As we are quickly approaching our destination the road becomes a very narrow dirt road in the woods about a mile long. Two massive, beautiful oak trees stand before a mansion, bigger than my ego being invited here. As we arrive, we park the car and exit, taking in the beauty of the house and the area around us when suddenly we see ten more cars arrive one by one. What we thought would be strangers exiting the cars it turns out to be our neighbors. What a relief. Confused, we all gathered outside and came to the realization that every single one of us had received the same invitation letter to this gala dinner. I guess I wasn’t so special after all. When suddenly, we hear the doors of the mansion suddenly open, we walk inside to an empty hallway.
It was dark and spooky when all of a sudden from the deep shadows a figurine emerged. He introduced himself as Tom. He began to give a speech on why we were all selected for this dinner and walked us into a dining hall. By the time we were all seated and ready to eat, Tom excused himself to use the restroom. I guess he had “2” go really bad. As soon as he exited the room not even thirty seconds later all the lights suddenly turned off for about five seconds. When they came back on, something was strange. We hear a loud scream from the end of the table. Everybody quickly turns and we see one of the neighbors with a bullet to his head. As the lifeless body plops onto the dining room table everyone's initial reaction is instant panic. Mine was an excitement for that extra meal. Kidding. After about a minute of panic we all begin to settle down, coming together to think “who could’ve done this?” We began looking around the room looking for clues seeing if there was anything that could indicate what just happened. There was nothing. That nothing caused people to become suspicious of each other. Kinda sus. Rumor began to spread saying the killer was among us, sparking up a huge scene. People began to blame each other, screaming and yelling, everything was out of control. Suddenly somebody points out something on a bookshelf and it wasn’t the latest version of Bedford. The shelf had a gun aiming at the chair where the man killed was sitting at and not only that, on the trigger was a string attached to a timer set to go off at a certain time. Everyone knew this had to be planned prior.
Tom returns into the room and asks “what is going on?” Everybody suddenly turned to him and began to blame him for what had happened saying he was the culprit. Tom denied the accusations but nobody believed him when again, all the lights turned off for a split second. When they came back on, Tom was now the one dead. The suspense in the room became heavier sparking even bigger confusions. Even more confusion than asking your girlfriend “what’s wrong.” “If it wasn’t Tom, then the killer is definitely one of us,” said a lady from the back. Who could it be? Why are they doing this? Why us? All questions that were being asked. Nobody knew the answer but one thing was for sure, if nobody did anything soon, they would probably be next.
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This is a humor proposal essay for our english 101 class. The assignment was based on trying to imitate someone’s writing style and putting it into our own so I incorporated humor and mystery/suspense into mine.