It happened.
I looked at him; immediately I thought to myself “Who is he? How have I not noticed him before? Gosh he is so cute!”
Then he looked up at me. I freaked out; I felt the redness burn on my face as if someone threw a hot towel on it. I looked away. In my mind I thought, “Nice going Maria, gosh he probably thinks you’re a stalker or something! Wait maybe he didn’t notice…”
As I turned into the next hallway I looked at him again and I found him still looking at me! He smiled at me. My insides almost exploded. I felt my stomach turn and my heart get tingly as if it were being massaged my thousands of butterfly wings. I couldn’t stop the smile that crept across my face as my face got even redder than it did before.
I ducked into the hallway as fast as I could. I didn’t even know what just happened; did I see him smile back at me? Oh gosh his eyes were so beautiful. I couldn’t ignore the feeling as it followed me all the way home.

The next morning on the bus I’m was still infatuated with whatever seemed to have happened yesterday. I had to talk about it; I turned to my friend Alex and asked, “Who’s that guy I see around you sometimes?”
“Which one?”
“The one with short black hair, he has lip piercing, wears a lot but not too much black, he skinny, and h-”
“You mean Kyle.”
My face lights up as soon as I hear the beautiful mystery boy’s name, “That’s his name?” I say with a little too much excitement.
“Yeah… why?” Alex leans in with prying curiosity.
I confessed, “I like him.”
Eddie joined the conversation as soon as he heard this interesting gossip and added “likes who?”
Alex said “Maria likes Kyle.”
Then the conversation dragged on. The whole bus ride to school was about how cute it was that “sweet little Maria” has a crush on a boy that makes her nervous. Which I might add is quite extraordinary for that to happen, considering I am normally outgoing and never shy.
We arrived at school; Eddie was walking with me when we saw Kyle sitting at his table with his friends.
Eddie poked me on the side with his elbow and asked “Is that him?”
“Yeah…”
“Okay let’s go.”
“Wait, what?”
Eddie got behind me and pushed me toward the table and said “Come on we’re going!”
I became nervous and frantic and asked “Are you going to embarrass me?”
“No I got this; I’m your wing man!”
“Okay…”
He walked up to Kyle’s friend and said hi as he shook his hand then turned to Kyle and said “umm it’s Kyle right?”
Kyle nodded
He said “well… have you met my friend Maria?!”
He pushed me physically into Kyle, knocking us both on the ground; I looked back only to see him darting off away from us.

I looked back at Kyle to see that I was still on top of him! I quickly got up and said "I'm sorry."
He smiled and said “it's okay,". He nibbled on his piercing and looked at the floor.
Nothing else was said and it became very awkward I said “well I’m just going to leave now" and I hurried off before I could embarrass myself more than I already had.
I slammed my hand against my forehead so hard at the thought of how ridiculous that just looked. I had to fix this mess I had made.

I waited for the bell to ring; when it did I waited for the chance to redeem myself. His last friend left him; I knew this was my chance. I walked up to him and said, “Sorry about this morning, my friends found out I like you and now they’re trying to play matchmaker.”
His face became red as he nibbled on his lip piercing and looked down.
Realizing the words that just came out of my mouth I added, “Oh gosh I didn’t mean to say that out loud, now you know that I like you, you probably think I am weird because I don’t even know you, and now I’m rambling, I’m sorry I am normally not like this, it’s just that you make me so nervous an-”
He cut me off (probably to give e a chance to breathe) and whispered quietly “maybe that’s a good thing.”
I blushed and looked down, I heard him shyly laugh. Then the bell rang, I looked up and said “I should go” at that moment I extended my arms out for a hug, I realized at the last second that that was weird because I don’t even know him. Before I could move my hands down and apologize he wrapped his arms around me and we were hugging; although it didn’t feel like hugging…well not your average feeling hug anyways. I felt protected and safe; our bodies came together so perfectly as if we were each other’s missing puzzle pieces. The earth’s orbit slowed, but then it was over. We both smiled at each other and went our separate ways, and so it began.
We spent more time around school together but sometimes I would see him getting lost in thought as he scanned the area around us, face full of pain and anxiety, I didn’t question it though for it always seemed to pass. He gave me his number and we texted every day, we had our own little inside jokes, and random topics to talk about like whether right Twix or left Twix was better. We came to the conclusion that it was right Twix though, and he even shared with me his taste in music and got me hooked on a band named “Twenty One Pilots.”  We wanted to see more of each other so we talked about meeting up before school the next day so we could hang out alone together.

The next morning came and we met up outside school and headed towards the tennis courts to sit out on the bleachers. We spent the morning together holding hands and talking about pointless stuff. He looked into my eyes for a long time. I liked when he did that, it made the world slow down, and it always felt like he was going to kiss me, it always had me on edge. Then it happened, he actually kissed me. The whole world stopped, everything went silent and stood still. I loved the way his hand was on my face holding it as if I was a rare treasure. His kiss was gentle and calm I felt his piercing against my lip and I was surprised about how much it didn't bug me, I loved it...all of it. He pulled back and I blushed, so to hide my face I hugged him.  We stayed there for what felt like forever, I wish it was. But all good things come to an end for nothing ever lasts forever.

I saw him the next day; he was dragging his feet and staring at the ground.
In a cheery tone I asked "What's wrong?"
  He took a deep breath swallowed as if he had an egg in his throat and in a low quiet voice he said "we can't talk anymore."
  Not even sure I heard him right I asked "why."
  "Because I have a girlfriend."
  My heart broke, I felt it.  It was as if two large hands took my heart and pulled it in separate directions until it ripped to pieces. I didn't know what to say or what to do, or what was happening, so I stared at him until he added,
  "I'm sorry."
  "I don't understand… if you had a girlfriend why did you let all this happen, why did you flirt with me? Why did you let me in your life, why did you kiss me?" I felt the tears start to form in my eyes.
  "Well my girlfriend and I have been having problems, and I guess I wanted to feel something."
  "Did you?"
  "Yeah."
"Okay so that has to mean something."
  "No I felt something, it meant nothing."
“What does that even mean?”
“I shouldn’t have done what I’ve did, if I could take it all back I would.”
  "So that's it, we're done?" I asked with the emotions sitting at the top of my throat.
  "I'm sorry."
"Did you even like me?”
"Yeah" but to make sure I knew we'd never be anything he added "but I love her and cannot love another. I'm sorry."
  He left, I didn't follow after him, and I let him go.

I felt used, hurt, and empty. So when I got home I got on my computer and looked everywhere on social media for him. I figured since he lied to me about not having a girlfriend, he probably lied about not using social media. It took me less than 15 minutes, and I found him, I also found "her" too. Her name was Stacy, she was a year younger than me, she was beautiful, and most importantly she's been dating Kyle for 8 months.
  I cried and cried, until I fell asleep.  But even when I woke up I didn't feel any better, I hated myself for letting myself get too attached yet again. I also hated the fact that I wasted and invested time on someone who had no interest on being with me. My passion never ceased and my sadness turned into hate, and it was only a matter of time before I snapped.

Over the next few days I couldn’t sleep, I stopped taking my meds to clear my thoughts, the pain and anger was eating me from the inside out. I knew had to kill him. In a sick twisted “You hurt me, now I’m going to hurt you” and a “if I can’t have you nobody can” kind of way. He didn’t deserve to live, he crushed my heart, used me, and he lied to me. I gave it quite some thought, I mean I had to be sure I wanted to kill him, because if I didn’t that would risk me backing out at the last minute and it backfiring on me. He could attempt to kill me if I showed any sign of weakness, or he could run away and call the cops and I go to jail forever. So I had to make sure that I wanted to kill him, and I was.

I got in the car and headed toward the park as I remembered him confess that he often goes there on Friday nights to listen to music and sit under the tree as he “watches the sun go to sleep.” I pulled up about a block away so no one noticed. I put on the gloves I bought, grabbed the gun out of the glove box, and took a deep breath before I exited the car. I replayed the last memories I had of him to get my anger going and my adrenalin pumping. I’m approaching the park and I could see his outline sitting in front of the tree facing the river. Coming from behind him I started slowly heading toward the river walking slowly and carefully. It wasn't until I was almost near him that I could hear the song “Truce” by Twenty One Pilots playing loudly through his ear buds. “I’ve been walking slowly for nothing!” I mumbled under my breath.
I stood up straight and walked toward him. I moved to the side of the tree, I could see his eyes were closed. I lifted up the gun and aim it toward his head. I calmly but loudly spit out “Take your apology back I don’t want it!” His eyes opened up as the last word I said left my mouth, and the gun went off before he could turn his head to see me.
His blood shattered against the tree, barley any landing on me. His blood ran down his body as he lay slanted against the tree, hardly recognizable anymore. There wasn’t much time before the cops were surrounding the place to investigate the calls that I was sure would come. I hurled the gun into the river and ran back to my car, leaving his dead body by the tree.

It’s been nine months and no one knows anything. My number was on his phone so the police showed up at my house… once. They asked me if I knew of anyone who would be angry at him for anything. I told them no, I simply said “Kyle was someone I didn’t know for very long, less than a month actually. It’s very unfortunate that this happened. He shared so much happiness with me in so little time, it’s a shame no one will ever get to experience this happiness.” I told the police to give my condolences to the family and then they went on their way. They never came back, never questioned me, I don’t even think they suspected me at all. Kyle must’ve done a good job at keeping our “relationship” a secret as far as anyone knows we were strangers.
Five months after he was dead they reopened the park to the public. I go there every Friday night and sit under the tree and listen to one of my favorite songs “Truce” by Twenty One pilots.
I sit here and to this day don't regret anything, he didn't deserve to live, and he didn't deserve my mercy. I put away my mp3 player and stand up getting ready to leave. As I turn around there is a gun pointed at my forehead.  A girl stands in front of me hair messy and make up ruined from crying.
I stare at the somewhat recognizable face...then it hits me, "Stacy?!"
  She c***s the pistol and yells "I know it was you!"