Ambrosia | Teen Ink


December 1, 2008
By Anonymous

He would always remember the day he learned to ride. It wasn’t the first day he rode a horse -- that day was lost in the deep recesses of subconscious memory. No, he had been riding horses for years before he learned to truly ride.

She was the one who taught him to ride. She didn’t give him pointers, tell him what he could do differently -- though he was sure that she could have found plenty of things he was doing wrong. It was the way she bent over her horse’s arched neck, damp skirts flapping, with her beautiful green eyes lighting up in her tear-stained face as she laughed because of something he had said. It was the way she became one creature with her mare as she shook her head free of the encumbering hairpins and shouted into the wind; shouted with triumph because she was free for a short time.

He was inspired by her strength in the face of despair, challenged by her vitality and cleverness. He pressed his legs into his horse’s sides, leaned forward, and laughed along with her, not because anything was funny, but because he was so glad to hear her laugh. She looked over at him as she slowed her russet mare to a trot. Her hair was damp from her tears and the rain, her nose was pink with cold, and her eyes were still reddened.

He would always remember the day that he learned to love her.

The author's comments:
Characters are what bring a story to life. Characters are more than the people in a narrative, the people that talk and walk and argue. They have lives, personalities, and quirks that never make it onto the page. My characters... they're demanding. They have a voice, and by golly, they are going to make themselves heard.

While working on my novel for National Novel Writing Month, a insane and amazing endeavor to write 50,000 words during the thirty days of November, one of my characters wanted - demanded - to have his story written. This is for you, Pierre.

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This article has 12 comments.

on Oct. 26 2019 at 3:47 pm
QueenOfTheWorld SILVER, Joplin, Missouri
5 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
"One should never save cake for later when it can be eaten now"
Winter, The Lunar Chronicles, Marissa Meyer

It's short but so sweet.

mamama said...
on Jan. 22 2009 at 4:37 am
Words so divine, like sweet dark chocolate. Story and characters brilliantly illuminated, glowing like the full moon. More, more, more, cry the plot bunnies.

greataunt s said...
on Jan. 21 2009 at 10:03 pm
your writing flows as beautifully as the horse and rider in your story. I would like to red the whole story.

cousin Laura said...
on Jan. 21 2009 at 2:19 pm
what an amazing piece. I wanted to read more-to hear what made her so sad and to read more about the relationship between these 2 characters. Looking forward to more stories.

on Jan. 21 2009 at 1:28 pm
Wait - that's it... I want more, more, more.... I really like the way you write - so very descriptive and flowing. Can I get one of the autographed copies of the 1st printing??? Carol

Beachwalker said...
on Jan. 21 2009 at 12:42 am
The feelings between the two characters are very beautifully expressed. The emotional connection between them leaps out to the reader.

Cousin said...
on Jan. 20 2009 at 7:37 pm
Hannah this is beautiful! Your imagery and tone is impressive. It brought tears to my eyes. Well done!

on Dec. 30 2008 at 9:47 pm
Thank you! Like I said, they're my Nano characters... I think I'll have to have you read the full thing, if you have time! I'm very flattered, and thanks again.

Ireland said...
on Dec. 30 2008 at 9:24 pm
Oh my gosh Hannah, I love this. I truly love it. You honestly captured the feeling of riding. You're free for a while. Amazing moment of recognizing love. :) I love it!!

on Dec. 30 2008 at 9:01 pm
Many thanks for the comments! She's sad because she has to do her duty, and it's not fun... But don't worry, the NaNo novel will have a happy ending. And, I have a hard time stopping to write, so never fear!

Nutty said...
on Dec. 30 2008 at 8:36 pm
So sweet. For something so short, it kind of puts the characters into interesting perspective. Why's she so saaaad? :(

RGallagher said...
on Dec. 30 2008 at 8:29 pm
I like this a lot. It's very well written and though out. It provides a lot of detail and paints a very good picture. Keep writing, Hannah!