He sat there in his innocence, not realizing how much he’s affected me. He doesn’t want me, I thought. The subway was lonely with just us on it. He was listening to music, but I could tell he wasn’t into it. He looked up from his phone, looked back down. I wanted to tell him he was the greatest thing that’s happened to me. He didn’t understand how I felt about him, how I’ve felt since sixth grade. I’ve known him since we were kids, and we’ve always been good friends. Ever since I met him, every day after school he would come over to my house and we would do homework, then hang until he wanted to go home. He always liked when he hung out because he could blow off steam from his parents, stress from his sports, grades. He made millions of nicknames for me. We had eaten fro-yo every night for years and years. We would talk about how easy we had it as kids, high school was tough. We spent thousands of hours talking on the phone about sweet nothings, and I would be on the line smiling as he spoke. He told me secrets he never told anybody, and I told him things I would never tell anybody else. He understood me, and I loved that about us. We were the two. The pair. The best friends, always with each other. He never caught on to my hugest secret, though. It killed me, he only thought of me as a friend.

He looked up at me and smiled. I smiled back, but I could only hold back tears. He looked back up and saw my eyes, filled with tears. He stood up and wrapped me in a hug.

“I’m a terrible person. I haven't told you a secret, but we’re supposed to tell each other everything,” I told him through muffled sobs.

“No Jacie,” He said, trying to comfort me. “You’re the best friend anybody could ask for.” I hated those words together. Best friend. Those words seem like they’re meant for squealing little girls, throwing slumber parties and having pillow fights. That isn’t what I wanted. I wanted more than what I was.

“Cameron, you don’t get it. You don’t understand how I feel. I have loved you since the sixth grade. You make me so happy when you can tell me things, and I love our late night prank calls to preppy girls and our paper ball fights at Christmas every year. I love when you call me Jacie, and when you play with my hair. I love when you defend me when other girls are being mean, and I love when you play stupid songs on your guitar. I love all those things we do, and every night when I go to bed, I’m looking forward to waking up the next morning so I can see you. But you never knew, and I’ve been keeping my mouth closed for years, afraid I would look like a fool if I told you. … ”

No more words could come out of my mouth, and I looked down at the ground. Cameron’s hand lifted my face up to face his, and I saw his beautiful, brown eyes. He leaned in to me and kissed me. I was surprised, but I went with it. His kiss was sweet, and I ran my fingers through his dark hair. His hands were around my waist, but soon came up to caress my face. The subway stopped. It was our stop. He grabbed my hand and we stepped off the subway and onto the ground. He lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around him, he held onto my waist.
He looked up to me and asked, “What if I had a secret I never told you?” I looked down at him and smiled.
“Well, you have to tell me, we tell each other everything,” I said.

“I’ll tell you if you tell me,” he said, grinning.

I looked down at his cute smile. His deep brown eyes shone, and I could see a glimmer of light reflected off it, making them seem darker. I almost got lost in them, but Cameron brought me back to earth.

I whispered to him, ”Okay. You can’t tell anyone, but…. I love you.”

He smiled at me and kissed me on the forehead and said, “I love you too, babygirl.”