My life is like a thunderstorm of pain with a light at the end of the tunnel. Life was happiness during my childhood with my mom and dad loving each other to death, and me being a regular child going to school and playing with dolls. All of this happiness ended dramatically and life didn’t mean anything to me any more. That day I was in my room playing with my dolls and then my dad came in with tears in his eyes, I asked my dad “What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” dad said in a gloomy voice said “Your mom had a car accident and when the ambulance was about to get to the hospital……” “What dad? What happened?” “Miranda your mom didn’t make it, and she died during the ride there.” “No dad you’re lying I know you’re lying.” “Miranda I wish I was laying, but sadly I’m not.” “Why did she have to leave us so soon?” “I don’t know life is just like that.”

The past 9 years of my life have meant nothing to me since my mom’s death and my relationship with my dad has not been the same either. Since my mom’s death he has been drinking all day, he even lost his stupid job for his alcoholic problems. What sucked was being sent to a mental hospital by the school because they thought I was nuts. One day I was in my room sitting on a chair and looking at the wonderful moon then suddenly my dad came bursting in. He was drunk and coming toward me and when he reached me he started sexually abusing me. I tried to free myself but I couldn’t, he was too strong. After all that happened I ran out the door of the house and started to cry. I couldn’t handle being in the house and after I left my dad was trying to get a hold of me but I just didn’t want to answer him. 3 months later I went back to the house after what happened that night.

Before those 3 months my dad has been trying to look for me like crazy, he even told the police that I have gone missing. I also was at a Women Center where women go when they get abused and assaulted. The lady there accepted me and told me I could stay there for 3 months until I recuperated and be released. When I was released, I was calm but I still didn’t forget what happened that day. That day that I went home was terrifying because I didn’t know what to expect, and how my father would react when I came back. When I was finally inside the house I went to the living room to see if he was there. He was. My dad just looked at me awkwardly and asked “Where were you Miranda.”” I was at a Women Center.”” Why were you at a Women Center.”?” Are you stupid, you can’t remember what you did to me?” “No, what did I do to you Miranda.” “You sexually abused me.” “Hahahaha you’re kidding right.” “No, I’m not kidding with you dad.” “Miranda you’re just making this up so I could feel bad for you.” “You know what dad just forget what I said, it’s impossible to talk to you.”

2 years have passed and a lot of things have happened during this time. I sent my dad to court for him sexually abusing me, but the verdict was that he was proven not guilty because we didn’t have evidence. After the court I just got sick of everybody and everything around me that I decided to pack up my stuff and leave. While I was leaving and crossing the street I was concentrating on how my life would be like in the future when suddenly…… A car came speeding down the road and almost running me over. I just looked up in shock to the car close to me. Then, a guy came out of the car and said “I’m sorry ma’am I was driving fast and didn’t look ahead.” “I’m sorry for not paying attention to where I’m walking.” “Ok instead of continuing to say sorry to each other I want to ask you, what’s your name? “My name is Miranda nice to meet you.” “Hi, my name is Carlos nice to meet you too.” “Well I’ve got to go see you around.” “Bye.”

1 month past, and Carlos and I decided to know each other more. When we were getting to know each other he asked me a question “Miranda I have started to have feelings for you.” “Well I never want to be in a relationship, also I don’t want to.” “But why” “because it’s my decision and I just don’t want to be in a relationship.” “Ok, I understand.” The thing that I hate is that I do want to be in a relationship, but after what happened with my dad sexually abusing me I just don’t want it to happen again. After that month Carlos asked me that question something tragic happened to him. His friend said that they were driving fast and having a good time. So as Carlos was driving he got distracted, and didn’t look ahead and then his friend looked ahead and said “Carlos lookout.” 2 seconds later they crashed into a trailer the only person that got injured the most was Carlos. I was in my room and then I received a phone call from Jack. I answered the phone “Hey jack what’s up.” “Miranda, I have terrible news for you.’ “You’re scaring me now, what happened?” “Carlos got in a car accident and got severely injured.” “What hospital are you guys in?” “Red Cross.” “Ok be there in a few.” “While I was driving to the hospital I was wondering if he was going to be ok. When I got there I ran inside and got to the room that he was in. I asked the guys if they could leave me alone with Carlos. Once they left I went to grab a chair and sat next to Carlos and just looked at him. I was remembering the time we spent together, and that he said he had feelings for me. I thought I can’t let go of this amazing man, and I should just forget about what happened with my dad and give Carlos an opportunity. So I looked into his eyes and said “Carlos would you like to be my boyfriend.” “I love you Carlos.” “I love you too with all my heart.” Then we kissed each other. After we kissed he let go of my hand and stopped breathing. I called the doctors but it was too late he had already died. I just started crying and said “I love you Carlos and I’ll never forget the smile you had on your very last moments.