The Long Goodbye | Teen Ink

The Long Goodbye

January 26, 2014
By SophiaD11 PLATINUM, Kissimmee, Florida
SophiaD11 PLATINUM, Kissimmee, Florida
23 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Intelligence without ambition is like a bird without wings."-Salvador Dali


The chair crashes to the floor. The phone skids across the tile. The bookcase topples to the ground. The kitchen lays in disarray. The bedroom is torn to shreds. Maria stands in the middle of the destruction, her thoughts a tornado wreaking havoc on her insides, as her body moves to ruin everything that reminds her of him. Everything except his dog tags. Those she will bury, for she doesn't have a body. The body was burned... scorched and singed. She never wanted him to go, but he was never one to listen.

They were standing stoically, Maria's face contorted with pain. Her husband stood beside her with nothing but their hands touching. Eventually it was Jeff's turn to board the plane, to join his fellow troops and leave his wife.
"Promise me you'll write." Maria's voice wavered, tears tearing rivers of rage against her flushed cheeks.
"I promise." Jeff replied, a single tear catching on his bottom row of lashes. "I love you."
"You can go now. I'll be okay." Maria tilted her head up in a futile attempt to not look heartbroken.
This got a chuckle out of Jeff but he didn't turn to join his troops. "I really do love you." His voice was so thick with emotion that Maria was surprised it didn't choke him on the way out.
"Jeff, you need to go." Maria's eyes closed slowly as if her sadness had exhausted her and she was now very sleepy.
Jeff turned to board his plane. The plane that would carry his body all the way across the world. The plane that would never carry him back.
The second before Jeff was ushered onto the plane his gaze landed on Maria and a silent whisper of a promise broke. Maria knew he would never write. The war wouldn't let him.

Maria's tears splash onto her cheeks, and her body slowly collapses, like paper crumbling in on itself. Her heart is ravaged by grief and the cool metal of Jeff's dog tags slip form her grasp. They clatter to the floor:; and Maria closely follows.



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This article has 3 comments.


on Feb. 2 2014 at 7:57 am
SophiaD11 PLATINUM, Kissimmee, Florida
23 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Intelligence without ambition is like a bird without wings."-Salvador Dali

Thank you! I was wondering if I should have expanded on it but I am glad I left it short.

on Feb. 1 2014 at 7:39 pm
Canadotas PLATINUM, Harrisonburg, Virginia
24 articles 0 photos 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
“As our circle of knowledge expands, so does the circumference of darkness surrounding it.” --Albert Einstein

Good job making an emotional story with few words! Nice job

on Feb. 1 2014 at 7:30 pm
Bethany_Saint GOLD, Dexter, Maine
14 articles 0 photos 90 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never regret something that once made you smile." - Amber Deckers

"Stories are more than just images. As you continue in the tale, you get to know the characters, motivations and conflicts that make up the core of the story...." - Livia Blackburne

It was a beautiful story... this might sound odd, but I loved the sad ending... and I'm not usually one for sad stories! I cried listening to the song "Forever and Always" by Parachute