Prologue


Never in my life, would I have expected to fall in to such a mess of passion, desire, and love. For him I would sacrifice my very soul….. Yet in the end I could not obtain him. The day we’d met, I knew my life would never be the same…. And I was right.

Chapter One- Annoyances come in many flavors


As I walked into the gates of the local pool I squinted in the bright sunlight. I’d never really liked the sun; I’d always been more of a night-time girl. I pulled my Paramore messenger bag onto my shoulder, as I checked the tex-message I’d just received from my best friend, Emma. We’d known each other for going on seven years now and I could tell she was up to something. Emma was the reason I was at the pool in the first place, she’d said she wanted me to meet someone. As I read over the semi-short Tex I could practically hear the giggles in her voice. “Sorry I’m late I had to go pick up my Bro, be there in about four minutes. Get us the usual, two hot fudge cones and I’ll meet you in the usual spot. Love U. See U in a few!”





I shook my head as I replied. She was always giggly and I wanted to know what type of mischief she was up to today. As I walked to our spot I could feel the looks I was getting. And not just from younger guys either. I frowned in disgust, “This is one of the reasons I HATE wearing a bathing-suit…. Let alone a bikini….I’m gonna kill Emma for this.” I pulled out my dark-blue beach towel and laid it out on the ground; I placed my sun-glasses on the towel and then began to change.




As I pulled my black and maroon halter-top over my head I contemplated why I’d even agreed to where this stupid bikini. I folded that and then sat down to untie my combat boots, so I could remove my black Tripp-pants and swap them for a pair of dark blue Tripp-shorts with chains. I looked down at myself then, contemplating my looks. I was tall for my age, fifteen. I had long legs that were well defined from when I used to play basketball. And my curves were in just the right places, I hated that sometimes. I got a lot of older guys –and girls- that would hit on me and I found it annoying sometimes. My dark-brown eyes were almost black in the mid-day sun and my short, dark-brown hair and pale skin contrasted well.




I placed my flip-phone in my back-right pants pocket and reached down for my sunglasses, placing them on my face. I then grabbed four bucks and headed for the snack shop known as Snacks Central. I walked up through the load of people heading in the opposite direction and made my way up to the register. “Akira! It’s good to see you! Emma with you, or is she not here yet?” Asked Mickey, one of myself and Emma’s best friends. He was in the same music and Literature classes that I was taking .I took his outstretched hand and gripped it, just like one of the guy’s. “No, she’s not here yet, had to go pick up one of her brother’s…. Not sure which one though.” I said as he got our cones and came around the stand to sit with me at one of the tables. “Probably Derek. He, Erik and Garret are the only three in town at the moment.’’ I thought over that for a moment, Erik and Garret I knew, but Derek I hadn’t met yet. I nodded my head and then looked up when I heard Mickey yell over my head. “Hey, there chica! Where’s your brother so I can kick his scrawny ass?” I turned and saw Emma walking towards us with a sheepish smile on her face. I stood and hugged her as she came towards me. She pulled back and punched me in the arm. “Owe! What the hell was that for Emma?!” She pouted, then, putting her hands on her hips, “You didn’t get me a hot fudge cone!!” she said pouting. I laughed.






Once we got Emma her cone we went over to the pool and stood in the shade, talking about what we were doing that weekend. “I was hoping you would come with me to San-Francisco, but-’’ I was cut off when a teenager, who looked to be about eighteen walked up to Emma and put his arm around her shoulder in a brotherly sort of way. He was handsome, I had to admit. But he had a cockiness about him that I didn’t like. “Hey, Emma…. Who’s this?” He asked in a deep, rich Italian accent. “Oh, this is defiantly the Derek Em’s told me about…. And he’s as handsome as she said.” I looked over his appearance, His thick hair cut so it came up just below his jaw-line defining his bright blue eyes. His muscles defined greatly by the black tank-top he wore along with the loose, faded blue-jeans. The combat boots her wore and the two black-leather Gauntlets on his wrists only adding to the effect.






“This is Erika, the girl I told you about?... Erika, this is my brother, Derek.” Emma said calmly. She looked between us, waiting for someone to say something. Derek smiled and I knew that everything she’d told me about him was true. I only needed one word to describe him. Womanizer. He moved forward and said to me in a silky voice, “Hey, there hot-stuff how ‘bout you and I go get a little something to cool you off, cause you are smoking.” I smiled politely. “Sorry, I don’t go out with jerks that degrade women.” And with that I pushed him into the pool and walked away, smirking. I looked back. Apparently she wasn’t lying when she told me he’d NEVER been turned down before.





Later that week, as I was walking home from school, I got a Phone call from Emma. “Sup Emma?” I said, I could hear the roar of an 86’ Mustang Convertible in the background. “Hey, Ari, You wanna spend the weekend over at my place? My Aunt’s out of town for the next two month’s so it’s just me. What do ya say?” I thought over that, she’d used my nickname and she only used that when she was up to something….. And by ““weekend”” she meant at least a week. I thought for a moment and then sighed. Whatever she was up to, it couldn’t be that bad… could it? “Yeah, sure. What time do you want me to have my mom drop me off?” I asked, she giggled and then said, “No need, I’ll pick you up…. Say around… 2:00pm tomorrow?” I thought and then replied. “Yeah that sounds fine… I’ll see you then.” I said. She said a quick goodbye and then I heard her phone go dead. Sighing I pulled out my house key and opened my door. Heading in to the house and locking the door, I than headed upstairs to get my stuff packed for tomorrow.





My alarm went off the next day at 12:00pm and I groaned as I pushed the “off” button. I climbed out of bed and grabbed my clothes for the day. I reached into my dresser and grabbed a black and maroon bra and underwear set, and then grabbed my black ankle socks. I closed the drawer and grabbed a pair of black Tripp-pants, the baggy ones with chains as well as a pair of black, fingerless gloves. Next, I walked over to my closet and grabbed one of my long-sleeved black, under-shirts and a purple Paramore T-shirt that I’d gotten at a concert the year before. I grabbed my towels and walked into my personal bathroom coming back out and locking the door to my room, walking back into my bathroom and leaving the door open. I flipped the lights on, silently thanking my mom for going to the store the month previous and getting me black-out curtains for my bathroom and bedroom.




I walked back out and opened one of my curtains that would show plenty of light without letting anyone see into my bathroom or bedroom. I then walked over to my stereo-system and turned it on, playing one of my favorite solo artists, P!nk. The CD was “I’m Not Dead”, her newest album, and the song was “Who Knew”. As the song started I stepped into the shower and Sung along with the lyrics, thinking of everything that’d happened with Mark. Crying as I sung with the words.

You took my hand, you showed me how.
You promised me you’d be around. Uh-huh. That’s right.
I took your words and I believe in everything you said to me, Yeah-Huh. That’s right.
























































As I sung I could see every time I’d doubted our relationship, every time he’d told me it was for nothing.

If someone said three years from now, you’d be long gone.
I’d stand up and punch them out, cause their all wrong.
I know better, because you said forever. And ever, who knew.






I cried as I thought over when it had all unraveled and I’d caught him with my used to be best-friend and half-sister, Maya.

Remember when we were such fools and so convinced and just too cool.
Un-Hun. That’s right.
I wish I could touch you again. I wish I could still call you a friend. I’d give anything
When someone said count your blessings now, for their long gone.
I guess I just didn’t know how. I was all wrong.
They knew better , still you said forever. And ever, who knew. Yeah, yeah.
I’ll keep you locked in my head. Until we meet again.
Until we, until we meet again. I won’t forget you my friend, what happened?
















I knew I had to let go, to find someone, who would actually love me. Someone who I could trust with my heart.




































If someone said three years from now you’d be long gone
I’d stand up and punch them out.
Cause their all wrong and that last kiss I’ll cherish,
Until we meet again. And time makes, it harder.
I wish I could remember, but I keep your memory.
You visit me in my sleep, my darling. Who knew.





What hurt the most about all of it was that I trusted him. I was going to give it all to him, and he cheated on me. I’d never felt so used or betrayed in my life.


My darling. My darling. My darling, I miss you.
My darling, who knew. Who knew? Who knew?








I turned off the water and grabbed my towel off the rack, I then wrapped the towel and my hair and dried off. I heard my music being changed and the song was Lithium By Evanescence.


~~~Teaser for Chapter Two~~~

Chapter two: New Friend, Romantic nights




As I walked out of my bathroom I knew who would be sitting on my bed. The only person who had a key to my bedroom door was Emma. I sat my towel from my hair onto the bed and grabbed my hairbrush off of my desk. “You seem….. eager to get me to your house……. You have something planned for us?’’ I asked as I brushed my hair. She shrugged and smiled as she replied, “How would you feel about going to a party?” she said. I looked at her passively as I pulled on my clothes, “Depends on where it is and who’s there.” I said while pulling on my Tripp-pants. She walked over to my duffel bag and picked it up. Placed a few things in that I hadn’t packed yet and sat back down. I knew this conversation wasn’t going to continue until we were in the car.