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Truth and Dare
The corridor outside was dimly lit by a weak light. The eight bed boards were squeaking, adding excitement to our girly gossip.
"Truth and Dare? Anyone?”
"Me!"
"Here!"
“Let’s start right now!"
Everyone was slapping and stamping their bed.
"Who's the first?"
"Dear Helen, for sure! She had a boyfriend even in primary school and the line of her boys can go around the earth!"
"Speak up, quick!"
Helen sighed and took in a deep breath.
“We were in the same class in primary school and became desk mates in the third grade. In primary school, your desk mates are usually the boys you know best. But there was something special about him. He was always polite and easygoing. He often sent me gifts. I was very shy in the primary school and I hadn’t got any close friends. My most vivid memory was that I was ill one day and stayed in the hospital, when he visited my apartment.”
“So romantic!” The girls exclaimed. We kept wondering why our primary school desk mates were so quarrelsome and childish?
“After that, we stuck to each other every day at school, only bidding goodbye when our parents came to pick us up. We knew nothing about dating at that time, but he was my first kiss. We were very very close.”
She stopped suddenly. We were very curious. Where was the boy now? We urged her to go on. She took another deep breath and finally, it seemed that it took her a long time to make up her mind to continue.
“I thought this happiness would never end, until the day of the school-wide physical checkup. It was a perfect normal Friday. We chatted all along in the corridor while waiting. However, he was sent to the hospital in the middle of the checkup, with teachers all looking serious and anxious. I was frightened, but no one would tell me what had happened. I thought I could see him again on Monday and asked him what had happened. On Sunday night, my heart was beating so fast that it was impossible to fall asleep. I calmed myself down by thinking about the questions that I could ask him the following week.
On Monday, he failed to show up in school. The class teacher simply said that he would never come back. My brain went blank, and I didn’t know what I should do. When school ended, I ran home and cried in my bedroom until dinner was ready. When my mom saw me, she thought I was frightened about getting the same disease and comforted me that the illness he got wasn’t an infectious one. When the bad news finally came that he had died in the hospital, I couldn’t stop crying. I asked where and when I can go see him. My mother said: ‘Oh, of course not. You are too young to go to a funeral. Your class teacher will go on behalf of the whole class.’ I got furious when my parents tried to tell me that I will meet other deskmates. ’I will never meet a perfect desk mate like him! He is one of a kind,’ I thought. After dinner, I sobbed while doing my homework and lying on my bed. Weeks passed, and I finally convinced myself that he wouldn’t come back. That was the first crush I have ever had.”
‘I couldn’t remember all the details now,’ she sighed. ‘But because of this memory, I can never put all my love on one person now. It does not mean that I have two boyfriends at the same time of course. But, I couldn’t bear to imagine that one day the one I love could just disappear from my life in a single day.’
The room went completely quiet for a few minutes, until someone finally muttered the courage, ‘So, who’s next?’
I am a rising junior in Shanghai Foreign Language School Affiliated to SISU.