Stacey sat in the all too familiar chair in Dr. Hardy’s office once again, twiddling her thumbs impatiently. Where is he? She thought to herself, glancing at the clock on the wall. Dr. Hardy was never late bringing back her reports. Stacey began tapping her foot anxiously. This can’t be good… Suddenly the door whisked open and Dr. Hardy walked in with long strides. At first he said nothing, just flipped through his papers, seemingly oblivious to her presence. Stacey knew then that something was terribly wrong. She remained silent as well, not wanting to hear the truth any time soon; maybe it would be better not hearing it at all. She contemplated walking out of the office all together but she ultimately decided against it. I need to know for sure. She stared at Dr. Hardy with hard eyes, wishing he would look at her and tell her already.

Finally he glanced up at her and met her desperate gaze through his thick glasses. “I’m afraid I have some…disturbing news,” he said with his usual placidity. Stacey resisted the urge to roll her eyes. No duh. Get on with it. But she kept her cool and nodded for him to continue. “The cancer has spread further than we had originally anticipated. There’s nothing else we can do for you. I’m very sorry.”

Stacey felt her heart nearly stop. Even though she had known the minute Dr. Hardy had walked into the room what he was going to tell her, it still felt like a punch to the stomach. She sat back in her chair suddenly feeling dizzy. Dr. Hardy looked at her with concern but said nothing. “How long do I have?” Her words barely came out audible through the lump in her throat.

“I’d suggest you do the things you want to do now while you can,” Dr. Hardy looked away from her then and Stacey could’ve sworn she saw tears in his eyes. She didn’t like making people cry, especially when they were crying in pity for her. She stood up, straightened out her skirt and blouse, and made to leave his office immediately.

“Thank you, Doctor, for everything you’ve done concerning my case, but I don’t think I’ll be needing your services any longer,” Stacey said briskly. And with that she left the office of Dr. Hardy for the last time without even waiting for a response.


“Are you sure you want to do this?”

NO! I’m not sure at all! “Yes,” Stacey said with a forced smile. Brad shrugged and handed her a small, pink tablet.

“This is so random,” Brad chuckled to himself as he placed one of the tablets on his tongue. Stacey looked at him in disgust but didn’t say anything. For all he knew she was just experimenting for the fun of it. But she wasn’t doing it for the fun of it; it didn’t feel fun at all. It was depressing. She watched as Brad closed his eyes in ecstasy and then she placed the little pink thing on her tongue as well. What have I got to lose…? was the last thought she had before she began to drift away into drug-induced delirium.

Stacey opened her eyes to find herself on Brad’s front lawn, lying underneath a starry sky. She turned her neck and saw Brad lying beside her, his eyes focused upwards. Stacey was still groggy from the drugs she had taken so she didn’t give too much thought as to how she got outside or how much time had passed. She began to feel a lonely sadness slowly creeping over her. Brad was just a guy she knew from high school. She only called him that night because she knew what kind of stuff he was into. She hardly knew the kid and yet here she was, taking unknown drugs with him. What has my life come to? She felt a single tear roll down her cheek.

Just then Brad looked at her and frowned. “What’s wrong?” Stacey sniffled but kept silent. She lifted up her head and stared at the stars above her. “How’s your treatment going?” Brad prodded further, gesturing to her bald head. “You have cancer, right?” He asked too easily.

Stacey shot him an angry look. “Yes,” she muttered. “And I stopped treatment.”

“You’re all better? That’s great!” Brad laughed and nudged her in the side. Stacey sighed and pointed at the night sky.

“What’s up there?” She whispered.

“I know a few constellations but-”

“No, I mean what’s up there?” Stacey could feel more tears gathering in her eyes.

Brad was quiet for a moment, then, “I don’t know for sure, but they say Heaven is up there…that God is watching us. Sometimes I believe it, like right now. How could you not with that,” he motioned at the expanse of stars up above, “looking down at you? It’s beautiful. It’s times like this when I think, ‘If something this beautiful can exist and we can see it, then Heaven has to be up there too, just farther. God must be one heck of a guy to make things like this.’”

Stacey closed her eyes and breathed deeply. “So that’s where we go? When we die, I mean.”

Brad shrugged. “Where else?” Then he looked at her thoughtfully and continued, “There’s something out there, Stacey. There has to be.”

She could feel warm tears trickling down her face despite her best efforts to stop them. “I’m sorry I never talked to you in high school, Brad,” Stacey whispered into the dark. “I always looked down on you ‘cause I thought you were just some burn-out.”

Brad laughed, “But I am a burn-out!”

Stacey turned to look at him again. “No, you’re not. You’re smarter than you think. I just want you to know that.”

“Thanks,” he said with a smile. Stacey stood up then; the effects of the drugs were starting to finally wear off and she stretched out her cramped limbs.

“Well, thanks for everything,” Stacey said awkwardly and started to leave.

“Hey, wait!” Brad quickly scrambled after her.

“What?” She said exasperated; she was half expecting him to ask her out on a date or something. She hoped she hadn’t given him the wrong impression. The last thing she wanted was to have him fall for a dying girl.

“I just wanted to say that I’m sorry I never talked to you either,” Brad tucked his hands into his pockets and gave a long sigh. “I looked down on you, too. I thought you acted so high and mighty with your A average and extracurricular activities,” he laughed and took her hand in his in a friendly gesture. “But you’re more than you seem, Stacey. You’re beautiful and I want you to know that deep down in your heart forever.”

Stacey could feel tears forming behind her eyes. The only thing she hated more than making others cry was crying herself. She pulled away from him and hugged herself. “I wish you hadn’t said that.”

Brad gave a sad smile. “You’re going to make a beautiful angel, you know. You really are.” Stacey glared at him and quickly turned away to leave. “Hey!” Brad called after her. She didn’t look at him but stopped to listen. “Have you ever been sky-diving before? I remember in a speech you made to the class how you always wanted to do that. Have you done it yet?” Stacey shook her head. “Do you want to go tomorrow?”

She slowly turned back around. “What?” She could hear the disbelief in her voice.

“You and me. Let’s go sky-diving tomorrow,” Brad grinned at her and Stacey could feel the corners of her mouth twitching into a smile.
“Sure. I’d like that.”