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Salty and Sweet
You’ve always been curious why I eat chips when I’m sad.
“It’s comfort food,” I said.
“But why chips? Why not chocolate?”
You pressed.
“Because it’s salty and sweet.
Salty for the past,
the tears that come from the bad that has already happened.
Sweet for the future,
the smiles that come from the hope of the good to come.”
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This article has 14 comments.
I spaced it like that after I realized that it was like a poem...I thought that if it was already so close I'd just go all the way. I think if I were to submit it to a magazine or something that was only fiction I would go back to the original spacing.
Thanks!
The good: I liked this - it was fun in that you could see where the character was coming from, commiserate, and marvel at the chip logic, all in about ten seconds. Great job!
The bad: To make it more like fiction and less like a poem, you could make the part where she said why she liked chips all one paragraph, instead of spacing it like that. But that's just if you want to - I don't think it needs to be changed. :)
The random: Good job!
First: Thank, again!!!
And second...I have no idea. Probably fiction, because that's what I submitted it under but I really don't know.
You're welcome...
If this gets published (which it should) do you think they would put it under poetry or fiction?
Okay, I won't count this as the fiction I'm suppose to give a feedback to because it is like a poem just like you said, hahaha. I couldn't resist after clicking on the name and see the length. I had to read it, hahaha.
So so short yet so sweet! Hahaha, I love how profound this is. You were able to capture such emotions. And you were able to give me a new perspective on chips in two short paragraphs!! Hahaha, that is insane :p
I highly recommend you to write a real fiction feature on these two paragraphs! Honestly, I could already see the story flowing through my head, hahaha. Don't worry I won't steal you work :)
If you haven't already sense my tone, I love this :D
Hope you like it!