Remember to Forget me | Teen Ink

Remember to Forget me

June 2, 2009
By Xinwen PLATINUM, Brossard, Other
Xinwen PLATINUM, Brossard, Other
44 articles 0 photos 25 comments

Roses lined the paths
Everyone else took, but we
Met by quiet lakes

Evenings spent giggling –
My laughs echoed on your skin
Bare in summer heat

“Ends come to all things.”
Reminding me of that, you
Took my hand and begged

Of me, “Remember,
Far into the bleak future,
Our time of being.”

Request accepted.
Great, but I would not of you
Ever ask the same

Today, I think on
My fate alone, a ghost to
Everyone and you

The author's comments:
Acrostic haiku

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This article has 27 comments.

on May. 21 2010 at 12:50 pm
flipsters BRONZE, Benton Harbor, Michigan
1 article 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is not fair, it's how you take the cards that are dealt that matter."
"Everything will work out in the end, if it's not working out then it's not the end yet."
"Don't let the clouds of today hide the sunshine of tomorrow."

I like it but I don't believe it is a haiku because haikus have a 5-7-5 syllable structure and this does not follow that. But it was a great story.

on Apr. 29 2010 at 10:12 pm
SassyJones GOLD, Los Altos Hills, California
13 articles 5 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We make our fourtunes, and we call them fate" earl of beaconsville.

God love it. What are the rules of a haiku? what do you think of my free verse- on my mind? 

on Mar. 16 2010 at 10:55 am
BleedingRose PLATINUM, Frederic, Wisconsin
33 articles 1 photo 378 comments

Favorite Quote:
*The darkness holds infinite possibilities.


I was hooked on the first verse! Very awesome! Mind commenting some of my work? Thx!


micky 919 said...
on Sep. 29 2009 at 2:54 pm
very well thought of, very sad but a good sad

on Sep. 29 2009 at 12:56 pm
munkyman95 GOLD, Medway, Other
18 articles 1 photo 100 comments

Favorite Quote:
I will become, what I know I am' Michael Jordan

Really good, loved the first verse

on Sep. 5 2009 at 4:18 pm
jennee21_ann GOLD, Helper, Utah
17 articles 0 photos 568 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't gain the world and lose your soul....wisdom is better than silver or gold."

"You can always close a book, but you can never close the mind of a writer."

very nice style of incorporating the hiaku part! :) as for the content, it is truly wonderful! bravo :) check out some of my work if you will too :)

. said...
on Sep. 2 2009 at 12:24 pm
Very nice. This is definitely the first the Acrostic Haiku I have seen here. That is wonderfully written as well! Great job.

Please read my work, and leave a comment or rate.