I spent my childhood scared of everything and everyone
At home I was being abused emotionally and physically
Though school wasn’t much better
There I was being bullied because I was different
Or because I liked a certain guy
Or maybe it was the fact that I wore baggy clothes and pajamas
Because that is the only thing
The only thing that could hide my scars
But they don’t see the tears I cry myself to sleep with
They don’t see the bruises hidden behind my clothes
Most importantly they don’t hear the cries
I scream out everyday
I am voiceless
Or maybe
They are just deaf
Maybe they don’t want to hear my cries
Because they don’t want to get involved
Or maybe they are too selfish to care
Or too in their own mind to notice
Either way I am still here
I fight everyday and cry every night
But I am still here
There are days when I want nothing more
But to end it all
End all the pain and the hurt that I feel
Because that seems better than life
Maybe then they will hear my cries
Maybe then they will see the bruises and the breaks
The scars that are usually hidden
That hide behind my clothes
Even then
They still will never truly understand
What I went through
Because they weren’t there
How everyday I was scared to wake up to a beating
Or how everyday I walk into the school
And ask what do you have for me today
How everyday I will go home
Lock myself in my room
Because it's the only place I feel safe
Even then
I still have the fear that I will get hurt
Some way somehow
Nobody will ever truly know my story
Because in order for you to understand
You would have to be there
I am a victim
But I’m also a survivor
The thing is
I am not the only one
There are many like me
People who are too afraid to do anything
People who can’t tell anyone what’s going on
Because their abusers
Threaten them
Or the people they love
And care about
They fear that one word will equal another beating
So they build walls to block people out
Even those who care
Because they don’t want them to get hurt too
Those people have no voice
So I am here to give them one
We are the voiceless victims
That nobody pays attention too
That nobody cares to listen too
We scream so you can hear us
But you don’t listen
We murder ourselves to get away from you
Over 42,773 of us die each year
That could be avoided if people just listened
Listened to our cries
And in the end
Are we really our killer?
Or is it the people who push us
Push us so far that we have nowhere to go
So far that we have no one we can talk to
So far that we take our own life because of you
Because you are so insecure about your own life
You took it out on us
What you don’t realize is how much it hurts
How far one word
One hit
Can push someone
Over the edge
You are the real killers
The real murders
Not us
You are the reason we can’t stand to live anymore
The reason we can’t stand to live for another day
Or hour
Or second
So next time you make a comment behind someone’s back
Or raise a hand
Or judge someone without knowing them
Remember that you will be the one who is blamed
You will be the one with blood on your hands
Not us
You are the murder
Not us
But you
We might be the one doing the job
But you are the cause for it
Because you didn’t leave us alone
You wouldn’t let us be happy
So stand up against it
Against those who push
Push people to their emotional limits
Don’t be the reason someone ends their life
Don’t be our murder
Stand up for the voiceless victims
Who don’t have the courage
To do it themselves
We are the voiceless victims
Please hear our cries
And help us
Because we can’t do it without you