Delusions of Grandeur | Teen Ink

Delusions of Grandeur

June 20, 2014
By ClaraJoy GOLD, Arlington, Virginia
ClaraJoy GOLD, Arlington, Virginia
17 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"Sometimes I freeze...until the light comes
Sometimes I fly...into the night
Sometimes I fight...against the darkness
Sometimes I'm wrong...sometimes I'm right."
-Geddy Lee sang it, Neil Peart wrote it.

I thought I was conversing with angels
But I was just talking to myself.
I thought I was telling a story of magic and power and trickery and love
But I was just stealing the work of others.
I thought I sang a song of great importance
But my voice was weak and my words rang false.
I thought I wrote of disaster and creation
But life and death eluded my reach.
I thought I stood strong against the forces of the night
But I merely cowered and held up my false prose as a shield.
I thought I was drowning
But I was only feeling the ocean spray on my face.
I wasn’t walking on water,
I was just standing on a reef.
I wasn’t working fearsome magic,
I was hiding in plain sight.
I thought I was dying.
I just lived.

The author's comments:
This is a critique of the martyrdom fetish in literature. The final two lines imply that if I had lost the battle and died, I would have had a much greater impact and more importance than what I have as a living, breathing girl. It also has a sort of cynical message to it ("it can always be worse") and a humbling tone. It asks you not to get too hung up on yourself, and to realize that life alone is a miracle. You don't have to be Allen Ginsberg or Leo Tolstoy to appreciate that.

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