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Clipped Wings of Innocence
November 17, 2013
The wings on which innocence flew
virtuous and pristine
clipped and maimed
to the point of grotesque vestige
courtesy of sin
© Jessica F., Bradford, MA
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This article has 10 comments.
ThePoeticJustice PLATINUM said...
on Sep. 26 2015 at 1:58 am
I'm not sure, but this sounds like one of those good girl gone bad things. I like it, good poem, and this makes my 3rd poem :) thx for sharing
author_musical PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 8 2014 at 10:57 pm
This is in response to one of your forums... Anyway I already posted my thoughts! :)
BandGeekAndProud PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 7 2014 at 7:02 pm
Okay, so this whole poem is very simplistic and fragmented, and I know that that's a style thing, but I woul have added words like "innocence once flew" and "now clipped and maimed." I got it, but it was a bit unclear, and I had to pause, pulling me out of the mindset of the poem. Also, just a personal preference thing, I don't like telling people what my poems symbolize in the author's note. I feel like it defeats the purpose of looking deeper into the poem, you know?
writing.is.my.life. SILVER said...
on Jan. 3 2014 at 8:14 pm
This is really short, but somehow beautifully gets the point across in a striking way. Keep up the good work!! If you could check out my poem "The Self-Proclaimed Architect" that would be awesome!
carolineklepper SILVER said...
on Dec. 21 2013 at 7:21 am
You are an awesome writer. I love this. Short but with so much significance.
MeganLamberger BRONZE said...
on Dec. 12 2013 at 12:41 am
Hey I really love this! You did and amazing job, especially with your diction. Crazy good!
author_musical PLATINUM said...
on Dec. 9 2013 at 11:00 pm
Great poem. It's a little dark, but so are mine. I love the way it invokes the image of wings. That image is so powerful in poetry, because in our life we go through many sets of wings. Love it!
Wow. I dont know why this isn;t published or editor chosen. This is really good. Love the message, we don't truly grow up until our innocense is washed away. It's not the word choice and construction per se that make this a great poem but also the structure and tiny details. *High five*
