I feel pain like somebody is stabbing me in the chest.
It never lets up.
It never stops hurting,
Not even for a second.
Six months late and it just never stops hurting.
And nobody will every understand what it feels like.
This is not a pain anyone else feels.
This is not a normal hurt.
These kinds of things are not normal.
They are not supposed to happen.
So people do not understand.
They do not know how to react.
They do not know what to say,
Or how to sympathize.
And I do not want them to.
They cannot share in my pain.
So they do not need to try and pretend like they do.
It is my pain.
And mine alone.
I feel it alone,
All by myself.
And I feel it endlessly.
I feel it first thing when I wake up.
And I feel it as I lay my head down on my pillow at night.
I feel it every second in between.
Because it is never off my mind.
I can’t get it out.
It racks my brain,
And gets tangled up in the process.
It is the pain with no mercy.
And I really don’t know how to make it stop.