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Before the Important Game

April 27, 2013
By ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
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ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Sitting on the bench before the important match
A rapidly racing, rambling heart
A stomach filled with sickening strange butterflies
Shaking, sweaty hands
A mind analyzing the most awful alternatives
The thought of failing
The eyes of the whole audience
Focused our your team
And on you

The sickening sense grows and swells
As the time to my entrance onto the court
Is tampered with every tick- tock of the clock
My nervousness is like a monster
Devouring me from inside
My nervousness is like a ticking bomb
Ready to make my courage detonate
Into a hundred maybe a thousand petite pieces

Harbouring my head in my hands
I inhale deeply and exhale noisily
I close my eyes and take a second
To prepare myself for going out there

The buzzer bombinates blatantly
Reminding me that my quarter is about to begin
It mocks my abstract anxiety of the absolute defeat
With my legs trembling I step out to the center
One more bottomless breath
No more time to waste
I face my adversary
I focus on the ball
The game begins

© Laura P., Highland Village, TX

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 44 comments.

ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 21 2013 at 4:52 am
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Thank you :D :D 
Metalhead08 GOLD said...
on May. 20 2013 at 8:48 pm
Metalhead08 GOLD, Port Republic, Maryland
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"I'd rather hate you for everything you are. Than ever love you for something you are not. " FFDP "You're born alone and you die alone" FFDP "I wonder out where you can't see, inside my shell I wait and bleed." Slipknot " If youre 555 then I am 666"

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Not a word of suggestion! Very relatable, easy flow, just great job!
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 15 2013 at 5:50 pm
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Thank you :)
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 15 2013 at 5:35 pm
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Thank you :D
Mckay ELITE said...
on May. 15 2013 at 2:55 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
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&quot;The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do.&quot;<br /> &mdash;Apple&rsquo;s &ldquo;Think Different&rdquo; commercial, 1997<br /> &ldquo;Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn&#039;t understood.&rdquo; <br /> ― Weihui Zhou

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Love this! Bombinates—awesome word. Need to use that one in the future. I felt the emotion and momentum building up as each stanza passed. I felt what you wanted to portray. And I enjoyed reading this. Good poem.
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 11 2013 at 12:47 pm
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Thank you so much :)
jmitchbb SILVER said...
on May. 10 2013 at 8:31 pm
jmitchbb SILVER, Chicago, Illinois
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I love it ,especially the 2nd part of the second stanza! My nervousness is like a monster/Devouring me from inside/My nervousness is like a ticking bomb/ Ready to make my courage detonate. Great job!
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 10 2013 at 6:37 am
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Thank you so much :) 
Someone2know BRONZE said...
on May. 9 2013 at 2:05 pm
Someone2know BRONZE, Council Bluffs, Iowa
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Wow!!! This is soooo amazing I absolutely love it!! :) Your word choice is phenominal and its easy for me to relate to! I actually felt like I was the person in the poem.. I think I actually got butterflies in my stomach..! This poem was great.! Keep up the good work!!! :)
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 9 2013 at 12:56 pm
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Thank you :) 
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 9 2013 at 12:56 pm
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
View profile
Thank you so much :) 
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 9 2013 at 12:55 pm
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Wordnerd54, thank you so much for the helpful feedbakc. :) 
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 9 2013 at 12:54 pm
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Thank you so much TheEpic95. :) It really means a lot to me that you liked it. 
Draco_Shadowfire GOLD said...
on May. 9 2013 at 12:33 pm
Draco_Shadowfire GOLD, Casa Grande, Arizona
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i like it because it tells how you feel when you are nervous or other things
wordnerd54 SILVER said...
on May. 9 2013 at 1:04 am
wordnerd54 SILVER, Sparta, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 80 comments

Favorite Quote:
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Oh God, this poem actually made me nervous! (I remember feeling this way before a game all the time.) Great job! I love the frantic rhythm of the poem - how it's rushed to coincide with the speaker's nervousness.  Very detailed and vivid descriptions as well. The only thing I'd work on is the third stanza - it seemed just sort of "thrown in there" in comparison to the rest of the poem (the others seemed more intricate and had more carefully chosen words.)  And I mean, that's really nitpicking, just for the sake of improvement - it's an awesome poem, regardless.  Nice job!
Helena_Noel BRONZE said...
on May. 8 2013 at 11:08 pm
Helena_Noel BRONZE, Burnt Hills, New York
1 article 0 photos 629 comments

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Wow! I could feel the anxiety, the restlesness in this one. The only thing that seemed to stick out oddly was the first line of the final stanza, that was odd. I had to read it a few times before i undrstood it. The rest i love, you really captured the feel of suspence that comes with the waiting in basketball, or any compitition, really. The second stanza was, i belive, the best, and its last few lines especially. Great work!
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 7 2013 at 11:32 am
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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I'm so glad that you liked it. :) Thank you   
ChocolateLove SILVER said...
on May. 7 2013 at 11:30 am
ChocolateLove SILVER, Warsaw, Other
5 articles 6 photos 158 comments
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Thank you so much, mollybug13. :) 
Mollybug16 BRONZE said...
on May. 6 2013 at 9:38 pm
Mollybug16 BRONZE, Cleveland, Tennessee
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I love this the description felt so real. 5/5
Rolledthestone SILVER said...
on May. 6 2013 at 3:08 pm
Rolledthestone SILVER, Nowhere, Other
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Well, everyone elses comments pretty much cover it. It was a great peice of work, 5/5!