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Besos
April 19, 2013
Your lips are hungry
for my labios:
they are wet with thirst
and warm with hunger;
your labios drip of
ravenous passion,
uncontrollable and
unsatisfied until
I am yours
and become part of you
—un cuerpo—
one body unified
by an untamed force
that neither one of us
can easily explain.
Besos on my forehead—
Besos on my lips—
Besos on my neck—
Besos on my chest
and abdomen
until you’ve reached
my ....
And as much as
you repeat te amo,
I must ask you,
Do you mean it all?
Or am I just another
cuerpo for you to lust
for thirty minutes or so?
© Anna Y., St. Robert, MO
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 20 comments.
Scarlett_the_pegacorn BRONZE said...
on May. 21 2013 at 2:51 am
omgawsh. this is my all time favorite of urs. :3
OldYoungOne said...
on May. 2 2013 at 2:32 pm
Well I like the images and I like te spanish. It felt a little forced to me in ways of the rythm but beyond that I enjoyed the incorporations of some of my themes into this poem. I applaud the structure and I feel honored to have someone model off my writing.
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 30 2013 at 6:44 pm
Phew! Good, I am happy now. The same goes for you though. If you ever feel that my work is not the best, or not your favorite be honest, becasuse like you, I want people to know me for my writing, and now is when everything really starts to shift into place: visions, passions, preferences. If we all establish an opinion now, We will be better offf in the future. So please, don't hold back on any of my work. TRUST ME, i can take it ;) keep rockin Mckay
So offended right now. No I'm kidding. I get that. And I respect your opinion. This one was different from my previous work. More mature and juvenile at the same time. Never be afraid to give your opinion of something you don't feel as passionate as someone else may feel. Thank you anyway. I know you care about my work as much as I care about yours, if not more. Keep rocking.
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 27 2013 at 11:24 pm
I have to say, if we are being honest (which i am), that this was a liitle to intense for me. I dont know, i certainly didint like it as much as i love your other work. But i have to say, though i didnt exactly like what the poem was about (sorry that sounded mean), i LOVED the descriptions, lie watching a movie in your mind. I also LOVE the spanish waved creativly in there. I am a spanish speaking person myself so i think that you crreativly found ways to have fun with it. Great job as far as structure and stufff, but like i said earlier, i dont really feel as apssionate about this peice as some of your other work. (so sorry if that was a really harsh and mean critique, didnt mean for it to be, just wanted to tell you what i thought.) oh and (you know i alwas love ur work so dont take this personally) keep rockin
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 27 2013 at 11:11 pm
If we are being honest, which i hope you don't mind, I am: this wasn't exactly my cup of tea. I love the spainsh, i am a spanish peaking person myself. I thought the descriprions were really good and i could picture everything in my head. I like the question at the end. I think that it really closes the poem yet also leaves the reader hanging. Call me weird, but i dint really like the fact that it was sooo sexy. trust me, im not like grossed out or anything. your work is always great, its just that, i dont know, there was something off about the poem for me to love it as much as i love your other work. Long story short, it wasn't my favorite. Anywho... Keep rockin Mckay
AHHH! Thank you. Yes, this is somewhat intense. Very picante, if I do say so myself. And I did enjoy writing the second stanza. For the record, I had do re-edit that stanza in order to re-submit it. First time Teenink said it wasn't wholesome for the site. But I would not let that dissuade me. This poem had to be on the site. Glad you like it.
LexusMarie PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 26 2013 at 3:39 pm
Ohh la la, Mckay! This is spicy! I love the first line, 'Your lips are hungry for my labios.' I mean that deserved an exclamation, that was exciting. The descriptions are crazy, whoa whoa. I LOVE this one, 'unsatisfied until I am yours.' I wish I wrote that, haha. The Spanish makes this all the more lovely. The second stanza, priceless. I wonder too, does the person mean it all? I'd surely hope they aren't just another body for that'd make the poem sad and loose some of the sexiness. Great job.
