You Said. . . | Teen Ink

You Said. . .

April 20, 2013
By CountryPopGirl PLATINUM, Lawrenceville, New Jersey
CountryPopGirl PLATINUM, Lawrenceville, New Jersey
38 articles 16 photos 64 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You love someone, you open yourself up to suffering, that's the sad truth. Maybe they'll break your heart, maybe you'll break their heart and never be able to look at yourself in the same way. Those are the risks. The thought of losing so much control over personal happiness is unbearable. That's the burden. Like wings, they have weight, we feel that weight on our backs, but they are a burden that lifts us. Burdens which allow us to fly..."
-Dr. Jack Hodgins (Bones)

We bumped into each other in the hallway
It was the first time I noticed you
You said “Excuse you.”
You didn’t say “Sorry, that was my fault.”

I then saw you in science class
We were made partners
You said “What should we do for our project.”
You didn’t say “When will it be done.”

You tap me on the back in English the next week
You pass me a note
It said “You look beautiful today.”
It didn’t say “Can you lend me a pencil?”

The next day in math you tapped me again
I turned around
You said “Can you meet me after class?”
You didn’t say “Can you help me with this?”

I meet you after class
My heart starts to beat faster
You say “Here is my phone number.”
You didn’t say “Can you be my tutor?”

I don’t call you immediately
I just call you three hours after school
You say “Hey beautiful.”
You didn’t say “What’s up?”

We plan to meet up after school tomorrow
I drag through the day until we get some time alone
You say “I really like you.”
You didn’t say “I like you as a friend.”

We start dating, and I love it
We are on a date in the park
You say “You look so beautiful in the moonlight.”
You didn’t say “It’s cold tonight.”

I start shivering, and we walking
You put your coat on my shoulders
You say “Feel better?”
You didn’t say “I’ll be fine.

We go back to your car
You start to drive me home
You say “I love you.”
You didn’t say “I never want this to end.”

We find ways to meet during school
We kiss and just find alone time
You say “You are amazing.”
You didn’t say “You are a great girl.”

At one point we are alone
I tell you I think we’ll last forever
You say “No, we’re eternal.”
You didn’t say “Forever is a long time.”

It’s the week before spring break
We are going to be dragged apart during the week
You say “I have to go to Florida.”
You didn’t say “Come with me to Florida.”

Spring break comes and you leave
My family drags me on a camping trip
You say “I wish you could come with me.”
You didn’t say “It won’t be so long.”

You kissed me before you left
I try and remember that during the week
You said you would call.
You didn’t say I would have to wait a couple days.

You finally call on Friday
I pick up on the first ring
You say “I got back early! I can’t wait to see you!”
You didn’t say you had fun in Florida.

We are home Saturday and I meet you in the park
I see you and I run into your embrace
You say “I missed you so much.”
You didn’t say why you took so long to call.

You start to act differently
I feel insecure
You say “Time apart made the heart grow fonder.”
You didn’t say what time together did.

I convince you to go to a party
I start to drink
You say “Let me drive you home.”
You didn’t say “Let’s stay and party.”

You drive me home, but I stay in your car
You have to walk me to my room
You say “Go to sleep.”
You didn’t say “I’m telling your parents.”

In my drunken state, I don’t want you to go
I make you stay in my room
You say “Your parents will. . .” I forget the rest.
You didn’t say “Alright.”

I do something and convince him to stay
We sleep next to each other, wearing clothes
You say “Goodnight beautiful.”
You didn’t say “This is so wrong.”

I wake up with a hangover, but it’s Saturday
You don’t leave me
You say nothing.
You didn’t say “How’s the hangover treating you?”

The next few weeks, I feel different
I start thinking you’re cheating on me or did cheat
You say “I would never cheat on you.”
You didn’t say I was being paranoid.

I get one of my girl friends to follow him
She sees you with another girl and I confront you
You say “We are just doing a project together.”
You didn’t say why you were laughing with her.

I don’t believe you
But I still give you a chance to explain
You say “We are just friends. I couldn’t live with myself if I cheated on you.”
You didn’t say that you had feelings for her.
I was content for the moment.

A week later I catch you and her behind the school
I scream at you and say you are cheating
You say “We were just trying to collect dirt samples.”
You didn’t say that you were kissing her. Why would you.

I scream that we are through
You grab my arm and turn me around
You say “Please, you have to believe me!”
You didn’t say “Please let me explain.”

I let him say his case for some reason
I think it’s a cover and leave again
You say “I can’t live without you Julie!”
You didn’t say you would miss me.

A week has gone by and you have been at school
One of your friends finds me and hands me a note from you
It said “Please, I need you back. I miss you. You are the only thing that matters to me.”
It didn’t say “I want you back. This break up is killing me.”

I still didn’t believe you and crumpled up the note
You friend has another message from you
He says “Rick never cheated. He is an honest guy.”
He didn’t say that you were faithful.

I partially believe him
But I don’t tell him
I say “I don’t believe him.”
I didn’t say I’ll visit him tomorrow

The next day, I visit you
You don’t answer the door so I let myself in
You always had the key under the mat
This time I wish you didn’t

I found you, just lying there, never to wake up
I cried so hard
I wanted to think that you were just awful
But you weren’t. You never were.

Next to you I see a note
Through my tears I pick it up and read it
It says that

You always loved me
You never cheated
The breakup destroyed you
You couldn’t live without me

You loved me with all your heart
You never looked at another girl like you looked at me
You thought I was beautiful
You couldn’t get through the next day without me

I was your one constant
The most beautiful creature you ever had the pleasure of seeing
When I said I was finished, you had no hope left
You wouldn’t live without me

I stay there for a while
I lay by you, praying that I would never wake up
You said goodbye.
You didn’t say you would take my heart.

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