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I’m Conscience-Stricken

March 31, 2013
By LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
More by this author
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

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I look at you and I try to walk through,
but you’re a labyrinth.
You blink apprehensively and act like you can’t see me.
My thoughts start to teeter and my face is hot like rum and a fever.
You’re looking gob smacked and take a step back…
I came here with a serene attitude,
but I’m perturbed by the way that you move.
My brain is reeled at the out of order behavior
and not knowing how to react I stood shock still.
Your life used to be picturesque;
how’d it end up like this?
I didn’t realize it’d been such an aeon since I left -
I did not mean to be gone so long, but don’t blame me for your life going wrong.
A request for forgiveness is all I can offer…
I see a yield sign in your eye
and so I assume this is good-bye.
You’ve calculated my assumption and the stab in my back says you’ve strayed from our pack.
I guess holding a friendship is something I lack.

© Harrison L., Ruston, LA

The author's comments:
Take what you will from this poem, my friend. I hope you enjoyed reading it! The picture just symbolizes friendship and how it can be so beautiful and ugly, just like the ocean. Comment & rate if you'd like.
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 13 comments.

Metalhead08 GOLD said...
on May. 20 2013 at 9:39 pm
Metalhead08 GOLD, Port Republic, Maryland
15 articles 0 photos 78 comments

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&quot;I&#039;d rather hate you for everything you are. Than ever love you for something you are not. &quot; FFDP &quot;You&#039;re born alone and you die alone&quot; FFDP &quot;I wonder out where you can&#039;t see, inside my shell I wait and bleed.&quot; Slipknot &quot; If youre 555 then I am 666&quot;

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Awesome use of imagery, literary devices, and a very interesting format! You are so talented I really enjoy your works!
SoulPoetry PLATINUM said...
on May. 5 2013 at 12:57 pm
SoulPoetry PLATINUM, Sierra Madre, California
29 articles 4 photos 69 comments

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&quot;I will work harder&quot; (animal farm boxer the horse)

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I love your style! The poem really stands out with all the metaphors and such! (The labyrinth metaphor is so true for all of us) This poem flowed so well.. I love your work so much! Keep writing<3
Wings10FeetTall GOLD said...
on May. 2 2013 at 8:49 am
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
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May your words be sharp.<br /> - Christopher Paolini<br /> <br /> <br /> Nobody&#039;s going to wait for you, so do it now.<br /> -Ingrid Michaelson<br /> <br /> <br /> Broken hearts heal, but never the same.<br /> - Jessica Romo<br /> <br /> Idiots rely on luck.<br /> -Sherlock Holmes

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This is awesome! It flows beautifully.
Infinite.Survivor.365 BRONZE said...
on Apr. 7 2013 at 11:17 pm
Infinite.Survivor.365 BRONZE, Bastrop, Texas
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Friendship is deffinetly hard to describe but I feel like your on point with this! props:)
AugustSummerFling PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 7 2013 at 10:37 am
AugustSummerFling PLATINUM, Mylapore, Chennai, Other
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&#039;For you, a thousand times over.&#039; - Hassan, The Kite Runner<br /> <br /> A professional writer is an amateur who didn&#039;t quit.

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This reminded me of some of my broken friendships.. It was very nice :) with a good word choice n a smooth flow :)
thatunknownthing DIAMOND said...
on Apr. 6 2013 at 10:31 am
thatunknownthing DIAMOND, Dubai, Other
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Struck me as quite an emotional one, this, and your words are well used too, to make up a fine poem for an idea so simple. 
Helena_Noel BRONZE said...
on Apr. 6 2013 at 12:45 am
Helena_Noel BRONZE, Burnt Hills, New York
1 article 0 photos 629 comments

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&ldquo;I&#039;d rather see a sermon than hear one any day; I&#039;d rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way: The eye&#039;s a better pupil and more willing than the ear, fine counsel is confusing, but example&#039;s always clear.&rdquo; -Edgar Guest

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Sweet work! I like your modern style and metaphors. The part about the yeild sign in the persons eyes was great! Another part I liked was "My brain reeled out of order at yiur behavior/ and not knowing how toreact I stood shock still." Just great! Keep writing, keep up the good work!
estucker1998 PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 5 2013 at 11:06 pm
estucker1998 PLATINUM, Tuscaloosa, Alabama
20 articles 0 photos 63 comments

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The voracious ambition of humans is never sated by dreams coming true, because of the thought that everything may be done better and again. --John Green, The Fault in Our Stars.

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That was really great and so true! Most poems show friendship as one happy thing, but this doesn't. And i loved that! Keep writing!!
7_Ambitions GOLD said...
on Apr. 5 2013 at 6:38 pm
7_Ambitions GOLD, Bronx, New York
11 articles 0 photos 11 comments
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I really loved this poem , i could feel the emotion, and the vocabulary makes it so much realier, I Loved It
Mckay ELITE said...
on Apr. 5 2013 at 12:53 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2230 comments

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&quot;The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do.&quot;<br /> &mdash;Apple&rsquo;s &ldquo;Think Different&rdquo; commercial, 1997<br /> &ldquo;Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn&#039;t understood.&rdquo; <br /> ― Weihui Zhou

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I'm so happy to have read this new poem from you. I love the language you use—especially in the first sentence "but you're a labyrinth"—aren't we all labryinths so un-decipherable to everyone esle but ourselves—hold on I think I'm having an epiphany for a new poem here. Anyway, I adore your explanation of freindship in this poem. Friendship aren't always rainbows and unicorns, sometimes they're 18-headed dragons that breathe fire. Love this!
-Char SILVER said...
on Apr. 4 2013 at 8:12 pm
-Char SILVER, Apple Valley, California
6 articles 0 photos 3 comments

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This brought a single tear to my eye. It's phenomenal. Keep writing, go you:)
Fallen_ PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 4 2013 at 8:07 pm
Fallen_ PLATINUM, Quakertown, Pennsylvania
25 articles 3 photos 433 comments

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&quot; a shattered world is only an opening into a new beginning with laughs, smiles, and love all around enter the world of the light and away from the broken darkness&quot;

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Amazing way to go keep it up :3
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 4 2013 at 5:59 pm
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM, Brooklyn, New York, New York
38 articles 0 photos 445 comments

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&quot;Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light&quot; --Dylan Thomas

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Totally relatable! Great job i know EXACTLY what u mean