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Quick Song

March 16, 2013
By LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
More by this author
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

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I am going to sing you a song
but first you must hush and take it all in.
Here I go, shhh, I'm going to begin.

You talk about time and waste sweet youth.
But that's no more for I'll tell you the truth.
There is no secret to stop growing up fast, so I ask you a question-

Will you make it last?
The song is quite quick but the meaning is not
see if you waste time on things that need a long blot

You will find yourself years from now
wanting it all back and wondering how,
but by then you'll know that those aren't important because past is gone.

I have one more thing to advise:
Listen to my song and keep it in mind
for you never know when you and time will be intertwined.

© Elizabeth S., Pompton Plains, NJ

The author's comments:
Will YOU make it last?
Time goes by fast....
Post a comment
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 8 comments.

Wings10FeetTall GOLD said...
on May. 1 2013 at 8:48 pm
Wings10FeetTall GOLD, Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
17 articles 0 photos 332 comments

Favorite Quote:
May your words be sharp.<br /> - Christopher Paolini<br /> <br /> <br /> Nobody&#039;s going to wait for you, so do it now.<br /> -Ingrid Michaelson<br /> <br /> <br /> Broken hearts heal, but never the same.<br /> - Jessica Romo<br /> <br /> Idiots rely on luck.<br /> -Sherlock Holmes

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This is great!
Mckay ELITE said...
on Apr. 3 2013 at 2:11 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2230 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do.&quot;<br /> &mdash;Apple&rsquo;s &ldquo;Think Different&rdquo; commercial, 1997<br /> &ldquo;Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn&#039;t understood.&rdquo; <br /> ― Weihui Zhou

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I LOVE—<3—the ending. The message is clear and couldn't be any more true. Make life last while you can. Love it!
SoulPoetry PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 2 2013 at 9:46 pm
SoulPoetry PLATINUM, Sierra Madre, California
29 articles 4 photos 69 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I will work harder&quot; (animal farm boxer the horse)

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This poem is so clear and i love how catchy it is! It will stick with me for a long time. The line "Will you make it last" stuck me the most
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM said...
on Apr. 2 2013 at 7:46 pm
Laugh-it-Out PLATINUM, Brooklyn, New York, New York
38 articles 0 photos 445 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light&quot; --Dylan Thomas

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Pretty! That's really nice love how the pic goes w/ it
StarlitSunrise DIAMOND said...
on Apr. 1 2013 at 7:27 pm
StarlitSunrise DIAMOND, Clemmons, North Carolina
56 articles 0 photos 253 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Blessed are they who see beautiful things in humble places where other people see nothing.&quot; ~Camille Pissarro

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This is very sweet. :) Aspects of it seemed a bit clunky to me (like the others mentioned with the last line of the third stanza), but I do not think that is too major of a problem. My favorite line is "The song is quite quick but the meaning is not". I think it really sums up the poem, plus, the alliteration is quite nice.
Jade.I.Am ELITE said...
on Apr. 1 2013 at 7:01 pm
Jade.I.Am ELITE, Fishers, Indiana
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&ldquo;If you&#039;re losing your soul and you know it, then you&#039;ve still got a soul left to lose&rdquo; <br /> ― Charles Bukowski

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I really really like this except for one line: "See if you waste time on things that need a long blot." That kind of brought me out of the rhythm of your poem, cuz it was a little random :P but overall I enjoyed this!!
MissExploration BRONZE said...
on Apr. 1 2013 at 3:43 pm
MissExploration BRONZE, Vancouver, Washington
1 article 0 photos 112 comments

Favorite Quote:
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I love your second and third stanza, however the part where you add the "on things that need a long blot" does not seem to fit, but I understand the use of it. Your ending of the poem seems a little quick, try to add a tiny bit more? Overall I like this poem on how you connect music with time.  
Helena_Noel BRONZE said...
on Apr. 1 2013 at 1:10 am
Helena_Noel BRONZE, Burnt Hills, New York
1 article 0 photos 629 comments

Favorite Quote:
&ldquo;I&#039;d rather see a sermon than hear one any day; I&#039;d rather one should walk with me than merely tell the way: The eye&#039;s a better pupil and more willing than the ear, fine counsel is confusing, but example&#039;s always clear.&rdquo; -Edgar Guest

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I felt line the final line should have been broken into two, but it didnt harm anything bein gthe way it was. I like the poem all throughout, though I did have trouble with "long blot"... i jst dont understand that phrase, im afraid. But it is a bautiful work. The second stanza was a very good one, with the beginning line really smooth and interest snatching. Great work!