Dear Mr. Wallace,

You did it! You wrote “A Poem About McDonald’s.”
So, now the question is... can you write a good one?

Now, I don’t mean to sound harsh,
And I don’t mean to sound rude,
But, here are your problems, dude:

First, I’ll point out your style you see.
I’m in seventh grade, and you still don’t write better than me.

“The Sizzle of Conversation,” please!
You didn’t even mention the bees, that PLOP! in your soda
and drink it up quick.
They glug it so fast, that I can’t get a sip!

And then you “Suddenly understand cannibalism.”
Why?
Maybe instead of people you can eat fries.
I mean, I’m disgusted!
Please! Talk about your food, NOT who your dinner will be.
(And hopefully it will not be me.)

Then there’s your ending....

It doesn’t even make any sense!
You could’ve driven away in a Mercedes Benz,
or
sat under a tree while eating your food.
THAT would’ve put me in a better mood.

But nooooooooo.
And also.
Anyone could’ve written that poem.
Anyone.

You're missing that something,
You’re missing that thing,
That every GOOD writer adds, that
Makes the words seem to sing.

Now, I know I sound cocky,
And I know I sound mad, but
When you write a poem about McDonald’s,
PLEASE!
Don’t make it so bad!