Nothing | Teen Ink

Nothing

July 8, 2011
By ohheyyyelli SILVER, Woonsocket, Rhode Island
ohheyyyelli SILVER, Woonsocket, Rhode Island
5 articles 3 photos 178 comments

Each day, you’re wearing away
Your flesh and your fat; your mind and your soul
Pound by pound it rips away pigments of who you are
Days spent counting calories and fighting them off
Until you are only a body, nothing to suggest there is
A person cradled inside of those frail bones
And what person starves them self of all happiness
in search of happiness?
You wake up, and repeat the actions, like a skeleton set on autopilot
Food; trash, fingers; throat, body; sweat, eyes; cry
There is nothing left of you;
You are a disorder


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This article has 62 comments.


xxlovinyouxx said...
on Jul. 31 2011 at 11:46 am
like the imagery and how u portrayed the ed, good job

on Jul. 30 2011 at 9:10 pm
PhoenixCrossing GOLD, Tinley Park, Illinois
14 articles 0 photos 178 comments
It's written so greatly that I can just see that person wearing away! Great job!

wasps said...
on Jul. 30 2011 at 4:59 pm
wasps, Other
0 articles 0 photos 153 comments
Agree :) 

akrreid BRONZE said...
on Jul. 30 2011 at 1:25 pm
akrreid BRONZE, Wexford, Pennsylvania
2 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I never said it was going to be easy--I said it was going to be worth it."

Oh my goodness. Your last line, "You are a disorder", is so powerful :) This is truly a great poem about a very serious topic... great job!

on Jul. 30 2011 at 1:15 pm
Amazing meaning, very deep and emotionful. Nice imagery and I really like lines 9&10 and the last line "You are a disorder". You wrote beautifully about such a tragic thing. Looking forward to more of your work!

Vicky11 SILVER said...
on Jul. 30 2011 at 11:24 am
Vicky11 SILVER, Charlottenlund, Other
9 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
The wisest men follow their own direction - Euripides

A very good poem, tackles a difficult issue very well, and I like all the imagery :)

on Jul. 30 2011 at 2:28 am
IAmWhoIWantToBe PLATINUM, Manila, Other
41 articles 0 photos 650 comments

Favorite Quote:
‎"I’m learning how to drown out the constant noise that is such an inseparable part of my life. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. I only have to follow my heart and concentrate on what I want to say to the world: I run my world." - Beyoncé

I love, love, love how this is about starving and being 'skeleton'. :)))

Criticisms are already given so this is all I could say... I think.


on Jul. 29 2011 at 5:29 pm
ohheyyyelli SILVER, Woonsocket, Rhode Island
5 articles 3 photos 178 comments
thanks, i appreciate it[:

Shadow878 GOLD said...
on Jul. 29 2011 at 4:41 pm
Shadow878 GOLD, Marion, Indiana
10 articles 0 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:3

"Do not pray for easy lives, pray to be stronger men." JFK

“Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.”Albert Einstein

"I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else."
C. S. Lewis

"A young man who wishes to remain a sound atheist cannot be too careful of his reading."
C. S. Lewis

"Anyone who doesn’t believe in miracles is not a realist."
David Ben-Gurion

"An eye for an eye makes the world go blind" Gandi

P.S. trying to give contructive critism

Shadow878 GOLD said...
on Jul. 29 2011 at 4:41 pm
Shadow878 GOLD, Marion, Indiana
10 articles 0 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:3

"Do not pray for easy lives, pray to be stronger men." JFK

“Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.”Albert Einstein

"I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else."
C. S. Lewis

"A young man who wishes to remain a sound atheist cannot be too careful of his reading."
C. S. Lewis

"Anyone who doesn’t believe in miracles is not a realist."
David Ben-Gurion

"An eye for an eye makes the world go blind" Gandi

The word choice was excellant, the rythem was good, although try to improve your structure. Other than that prettey good

on Jul. 29 2011 at 2:54 pm
JTboiiDrama PLATINUM, Chicago, Illinois
27 articles 0 photos 46 comments

Favorite Quote:
It is what it is

I loved it you put light on a thing that doesn't have much light a job well done

on Jul. 29 2011 at 2:05 pm
poetic.eyes PLATINUM, Everson, Washington
23 articles 3 photos 198 comments

Favorite Quote:
eARTh

WOW! Touching!  especially like the third line!

Ashly SILVER said...
on Jul. 29 2011 at 1:22 pm
Ashly SILVER, Louisville, Kentucky
9 articles 1 photo 16 comments
i love this, it's so relateable. i suffer from anorexia. would you please check out my article on the effects of anorexia on teens.

Ashly said...
on Jul. 29 2011 at 1:14 pm
i love this its so relateable. i suffer fro an eating disorder would you read up on my article "the effects of anorexia on teens?"

on Jul. 29 2011 at 12:57 pm
Absolutely beautiful!

Gigi142 said...
on Jul. 29 2011 at 11:59 am
Love this piece! Very original. SO MUCH emotion! It was sad but true and it was truly an amazing piece of writing.

on Jul. 29 2011 at 11:13 am
b_gomez114 BRONZE, East Haven, Connecticut
3 articles 0 photos 7 comments
great work! a simple yet deep idea to write about..certainly a problem in today's society. nice to see a writing about a social issue

on Jul. 28 2011 at 7:35 pm
Cryswithaly SILVER, Kokomo, Indiana
5 articles 1 photo 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
When I was 5 my mother told me the key to life is happiness. My teacher asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down happy. She said I didn't understand the assignment. I told her she didn't understand life.
-John Lennon (Revised)

I love this poem!! I think i'll favortie it.

austenite GOLD said...
on Jul. 26 2011 at 12:35 pm
austenite GOLD, River Falls, Wisconsin
13 articles 0 photos 177 comments

Favorite Quote:
...one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love....I love...I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on. -Mr. Darcy

I think this is a fantastically written poem!  It's gripping and emotionally intense - I really like the ending (even though it's sad) because it totally works.

on Jul. 24 2011 at 9:52 pm
TwasBrilling BRONZE, Staunton, Va, Virginia
4 articles 0 photos 79 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The owl of Minerva spreads its wings only with the falling of the dusk" -H.W. Hegel

"Words are our most inexhaustable source of magic' -Albus Dumbledore

I agree about the commas, but you really packed alot of emotion into this!!