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First time
She grips his hand
as he lead her
to the dance floor
his hand reaches
her hips, his lips
slowly caress her cheek
and moves to her lips
as they rock back and fourth
she feels as if the
whole world stop working
just for them, there first dance
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This article has 7 comments.
Ok?
And it was an okay poem
With lots of editing mistakes
It should be "leads her"
and "back and forth"
And usually people don't kiss on their first dance, and if they do, it probably isn't the first thing they do, so you probably shoul've included more dancing, less kissing. I'm NOT being mean, (at least I'm not trying to be:) just critical. I truly believe that this poem can go places if you put some more dancing and feelings in it. That's just my opinion! Keep writing though!!! :):):);)