A Dying Soldier | Teen Ink

A Dying Soldier

July 6, 2010
By MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.


A dying soldier
Once looked me dead in the eye
He told me to hold onto forever
To let the tears run dry
A dying soldier
Told me he loved me
To never lose hope
To trample the thoughts of longing
To unstrangle the hands that choke
A dying soldier
Told me to trust him
To remember my purpose in life
When I was lost, he would find me
Then tell me everything would be alright
A dying soldier
Showed me his wounds
The red blood escaping, set free
He showed me his very real beating heart
Then the lungs to which he breathed
He told me to close my eyes
Then lie back and remember
He kissed me on my lips
A surprise, all too very clever
A dying soldier
Told me I was living
Very real, and not alone
With this he caressed my cheek
And then my heart had flown
He looked me in the eyes
And suddenly I knew,
My rock, soldier and my love
Was leaving me, all too very soon.


The author's comments:
Be thankful for what you've got. Treasure all that was given to you. Understand the meaning of love. And also that you are not alone. We lose the ones we love, however they will always remain in our hearts and minds, to remind us of our purpose in life.

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This article has 20 comments.


on Jul. 25 2010 at 8:16 pm
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

thank you so much!! and yes of course i'll check out your work. can't wait to read it!

on Jul. 25 2010 at 8:14 pm
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

thank you soooo much. your comment really means a lot to me, and thank you for telling me your honest oppinion. i'm so glad that it touched you!! that you:)

on Jul. 23 2010 at 6:07 pm
WritingLoverForever PLATINUM, Bowling Green, Ohio
32 articles 2 photos 198 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's not about success; it's about significance.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

This is so touching. I love it. It's very relatable and flows so well, and the words are so deep. Nice job, and could you check out some of my work please? I have a link for one of my submissions in the "About Me" box on my page if you want to read that too. (I had to put the link in there because I accidentally submitted it anonymously; oops)

on Jul. 18 2010 at 8:53 pm
Doomcarrot GOLD, Angola, Indiana
17 articles 1 photo 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"There is no light but the light in your eyes/ There is no light, no light in these skies/ There is no sound but of how I cry/ There is no sound, no sound in this night..."

Wow!! This is a really wonderful poem. It touched my heart in a certain way that I really don't think I've felt in a while. Thank you so much for sharing this. It's truly great. And thank you for reading my work- if you hadn't left that comment, I never would've found this. Superb!

on Jul. 17 2010 at 12:39 pm
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

thanks so much!!

on Jul. 17 2010 at 12:39 pm
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

thanks so much:) that means a lot to me, and thanks for the constructive critism. i appriciate it.

on Jul. 17 2010 at 9:21 am
HarryPotter BRONZE, Manhattan, Kansas
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Snape killed Dumbledore."

There are one or two lines that might be syllable heavy, but you don't even notice because the poem is just fantastic. Not only does it really highlight the tragedy of war and death, but the way the love is portrayed is really good. Kudos, it really is a great poem!

on Jul. 16 2010 at 11:35 pm
Emo_Girl09087 SILVER, Greenville, Pennsylvania
6 articles 2 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
" ones who dissobey the rules are scum, but those who betray their friends are even worse scum."

amazing poem! egt it published! i loved it i'm so rating it 5/5

on Jul. 15 2010 at 9:28 pm
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

thankss:)

and i know, i have the tendancy to write sad poetry...i'm not sure why. lol. just my thoughts i guess!

look out for my new work that hasn't yet been accepted to the site if you like this:) thanks again!


on Jul. 15 2010 at 9:27 pm
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

thank you so much. i'm glad you like it and i really appriciate it. i've submitted a ton of work, but it just hasn't been accepted yet. but if you like it then you should check out my other work coming out:) thanks a bunch!

CloneA BRONZE said...
on Jul. 15 2010 at 2:12 pm
CloneA BRONZE, Wexford, Pennsylvania
2 articles 3 photos 13 comments
So pretty!!!!!!!! But very sad :(

shocking. GOLD said...
on Jul. 15 2010 at 12:26 pm
shocking. GOLD, West Bloomfield, Michigan
14 articles 0 photos 14 comments
wow this is just amazing :) keep writing!

on Jul. 14 2010 at 12:47 pm
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

thanks so much:)

on Jul. 14 2010 at 12:37 pm
waywithwords GOLD, Forest Hill, Maryland
16 articles 0 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
~~Isn't it funny how the most important things in life aren't things?~~

it's so sad, but it's CRAZY gooooddd!!!!

on Jul. 14 2010 at 10:53 am
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

oh my gosh that you so much!! you have no idea how much that means to me. and im really happy you liked it:) ive submitted tons of my work, but im new to the site and the majority of it has not yet been accepted. i hope you'll view my work and see if you like that as well when it gets accepted tho:)

thanks so much again!


on Jul. 14 2010 at 8:16 am
HeatherBee BRONZE, I Live In, Texas
1 article 0 photos 1979 comments

Favorite Quote:
Go on and try to tear me down. I will be rising from the ground, like a skyscraper

Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect

oh my God, i was like on the verge of crying...this piece is so touching and sad and amazingly beautiful.. Dx oh my goodness!! u really connected with the reader thru this. grreat job!! outstanding

on Jul. 13 2010 at 8:54 am
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

thanks so much!

on Jul. 13 2010 at 8:53 am
MercedesXO DIAMOND, South Easton, Massachusetts
52 articles 0 photos 280 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I realize that life is risks. It's acknowledging the past but looking forward. It's taking chances that we will make mistakes but believeing we all deserve to be forgiven."
-The Dead Tossed Waves.

thank you:) i'm glad you like it.

on Jul. 13 2010 at 1:19 am
BekkahsLoopy GOLD, San Jose, California
10 articles 4 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Keep looking forward; don't look back."
"To the world, you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."

sad, but moving. i love it. makes me think of the soldiers out there on the other side of the world.

on Jul. 12 2010 at 11:52 pm
LostAngel DIAMOND, Jersey, New Jersey
65 articles 0 photos 89 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Just live your life, if people don't like the way you are doing it then they can get out of it" "if you can't stand me at my worst you dont deserve me at my best"

Sad, very sad, but a greatttt peice. Thanks for reading some of mine too. I feel very thankful after reading this, you have moved me