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I Love...Him?
June 7, 2010
when I'M
kissing HIM
I wish it was
YOUR arms
wrapped
around MY waist
YOUR fingers
hooked
in MY belt loops
pulling
MY hips
close to YOURS
I wish it was
YOUR lips
moving
so desperately
against MINE
YOUR hair
tangled
in MY fingers
and when MY lips
break
away from HIS
and WE
pull
into a hug
I look over HIS shoulder
wishing
it was YOURS
and a single tear
escapes
from MY eye
cascading
down MY cheek
until it finally
soaks
into the soft fabric
of HIS shirt
I wish
YOU could see
MY tears
and be there
for ME
when I
need YOU most.
© Nicole B., Newcastle, WA
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 10 comments.
sparkofheart GOLD said...
on Aug. 20 2011 at 11:06 am
Thank you so much!! It means a lot to me :) I love hearing everyone's feedback and it really helps me grow as a writer.
SilverLuna SILVER said...
on Jun. 1 2011 at 3:32 pm
I made a promise that I'd check out some of your work way back ago, and now I'm making good on that promise. I hope you forgive me for taking so long. As to the poem, I really liked it. The alternative type what with the capitals for emphasis really add an element both rythmically and tone-wise. Good job!(:
sparkofheart GOLD said...
on Oct. 8 2010 at 3:44 pm
thanks!! :)
sparkofheart GOLD said...
on Oct. 8 2010 at 3:43 pm
hey thank you!! that means a lot :)
Youth.of.the.Nation SILVER said...
on Sep. 16 2010 at 4:46 pm
AMAZING!!! The way you describe her internal battle with all the capitalization is awesomely fantastic- I loved every minute of it!!!
sparkofheart GOLD said...
on Sep. 13 2010 at 10:09 pm
hahaha thanks! your enthusiasm totally pumps me up :)
apocalyptigirl BRONZE said...
on Sep. 13 2010 at 8:46 pm
AHHHHH ZOMGZOMGZOMG I LOVE THIS. Everything about it was so cool---the capitalization of the pronouns, the structure, the descriptions of the kiss, the way you conveyed the speaker's emotion--- = favorite at first sight, lol. SERIOUSLY, this is GOOD. Like, AWESOME good. Ok im done now.
sparkofheart GOLD said...
on Sep. 13 2010 at 8:28 pm
thank youu :)
LexieMonster SILVER said...
on Sep. 3 2010 at 6:49 am
This made me think. My past can relate to this so well. :) Love it.
