Day Thirteen | Teen Ink

Day Thirteen

January 18, 2010
By fzakeri1205 SILVER, Toledo, Ohio
fzakeri1205 SILVER, Toledo, Ohio
8 articles 7 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
\"It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.\" - e.e. cummings

They sent me away
I asked myself what was wrong
A gay daughter in need
I only wanted to feel love
Day thirteen of rehab
I’m diseased
This sickness is a disgrace
I’m the dirtiest filth there is

Our sins will be forgotten

I never got the chance to sin

Once we become right again

Everything I am is wrong

Choose to stop lying

I wish I could go back

And playing this game

I don’t deserve to live

God, he could love us

Forgive all our sins

Gay can’t be forgiven

Seventeen years as a Christian

My prayers were poison

It doesn’t count when you’re a fag

I was hurting God

Heterosexuals are true Christians

I never really believed in God

It’s a shame to your family

I’m causing them pain

Abusing their love

I deserve to be alone

you forever

Forever was last week

You’re our little angel

Forever was over

My soul’s kept the film

Constantly reeling

Recalls the bible glaring

Judging from the coffee table

With its defiant stare

Quietly, but surely

Questioning my loyalty

Silence leaving me alone

frightened and alone

My only companion: the rough leather

Occupying my hands

Interrupted by the choked, piercing bullet:

How could this be?!

It’s just who I am

We raised you just right

And I’m still the same person

By the book, in fact

I drowned in shame

I just… don’t understand

What is there to get?

You need to be fixed

I was damaged goods

Why is this happening to us?

Why are they doing this to me?

Today you can change

I’ve heard this before

Today you can be straight

I wasn’t yesterday

Love yourself enough to stop lying

I hate myself more than before

You can be loved again

I am alone and isolated

You can go home

I will be loved when I lie

We only want to help you
Destroy this film

Forget this scene

Erase this movie

I only want to die

The author's comments:
There are several inspirations for this poem, the biggest being my dedication to the gay rights movement. I myself am not homosexual, but I have several people extremely close to me, including family, that are. This poem was meant to capture the feelings of a teen girl in a religious family who is sent to a camp to get "fixed." The different voices include the daughter, the parents, and the collective voice of the facility "helping" the young girl.

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This article has 1 comment.

HaHmAh12 GOLD said...
on Feb. 4 2010 at 10:40 pm
HaHmAh12 GOLD, Toledo, Ohio
12 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"At the age of six I wanted to be a cook. At seven I wanted to be Napoleon. And my ambition has been growing steadily ever since." ~Salvador Dali

yours was awesome.

we should have aced this.