Put myself higher?

I jab my toe against a hard pavement,

not reacting to the pain,

to draw no attention.

Put her higher

I shower her with compliments

rolling my eyes when I recieve one,

"I hate the way I look", I say to myself

Put myself higher?

I have myself stepped on like a doormat

but say nothing

I'm afraid of conflict.

Put it higher

I do more than expected in school

even when im under the weather,

suck it up and keep going, I say to myself

Put myself higher?

I feel like crying

but dont feel entitled to

when i know there are other people

hurting more than me.

Put them higher

I make my friends laugh

while demeaning myself

"Your emotions dont matter", I say to myself

Put myself higher?

I overtrain in the gym

"lose the pounds, gain the muscle"

sounds more like a job than a coping skill.

Put him higher? 

Spending hours on the phone 

keeping eachother company,

I finally share my thoughts and feelings,

"You are just like me", he replies.