It's pain, it's agony that makes me smile.

The words he said...

I've been waiting for.

It lasted for two hours.

The smile, that is.

But then it faded, and my tears took control.

They took control of my heart, pushing against it.

It's beautiful.

A beautiful, beautiful pain.

He said he'll never leave me, he promised.

He said he'll stay with me until the day he dies.

And like a baby hungry for its mother's breast milk, I'm clinging to those words as if they are (or maybe they are) my safety rope

As I climb further and further up, up, up...

To the unknown

What would it feel like?

Well, the real question is what am I feeling like right now,

As I'm writing this—as I'm speaking out those words?

What is it?

It's... it's... its—it's beautiful, but it hurts.

What if he doesn't live up to it?

What if everyone's right?

I'm the only one who's giving him a chance, nobody else.

Is that wrong, or is that right?

Just... I can't help my heart's fright.

Because right now...

Little does he know, that right now, if he leaves—if he does anything to break my trust....

There is no coming back.

Will he live up to it?

I cry everyday.

I miss him.

I really do.

I want him.

I want him to hold me; I want to be his little girl.

It's selfish, I know.

But, I've always been his little girl,

And I want to make him proud, and I want him to hold me; I want him to be with me in my achievements.

Maybe they will make up for the times he wasn't there, I don't know.

What I know right now is that I'm scared.

I'm scared...

I'm scared this is all a dream that I'm going to wake up from and snap out of it.

I'm scared that these are just meaningless words.

Can I trust him?