I’ve over exceeded myself,

placed a limit on my expectations,

tried every flavor of paint,

tried to visualize every single color

to find myself in some way;

tis’ the method to relieve the dark charcoal that has embraced me.

I'm an artist...

nothing more.

I am Sophie,

the artist.

Is that all?

I guess it's a gift;

at least many perceive it that way...

Maybe? Could be?

I don’t know? I'm not sure?

Who am I?

I'm an artist...

nothing more.

I am Sophie,

the artist.

is that all?

Really?

I recall the time I dreamed with the stars,

I overlooked the clouds that gently traveled

and fused with each other, up far.

I’d imagine my future, what it would be like.

I recall the time I dreamed of being a singer.

The rainbow lights in the stage shined on me

as I played my electric guitar and

sung with a big band,

I was the spotlight,

I was a rockstar.

Still, I am none of those things.

None of those dreams reflect me;

according to what people say.

I recall the time I dreamed of saving people.

Believing I could fly

convinced my friends to watch me

as I began to slide,

running through the concrete floor

as I reached the edge

I stopped and set a big loud thump

as I jumped off.

But, instead of being graced by the wind,

I was graced by the cold blood stained concrete floor.

I recall crying as I went to bed.

Not knowing what the future held

for me,

I guess I was and am scared.

I am Sophie.

an artist.

That's it!

I am terrible at many things:

send the cringiest texts,
have a hard time socializing

as I try to make some friends.

I am terrible at many things:

fail 20 volleyball serves in a row,

forget to drink water,

I walk down a step fall.

I want to be good at something...

Something that is not art,

Something that resembles who I am

But does not break me apart.

A talent or a gift should not define me,

Nor people’s opinion

On who I should be.

Dreams reflect my deepest truths;

They seem to be far from reality.

I choose my future,

That I'm so insecure about.

I decide on my future,

One allows me to be found.

I am Sophie.

Yeah, that's me.

The artist?

Could be.

I am Sophie.

That's all that matters.

Those who speak

Dont know me.

Those who judge

Avoid me.

I guess I’m amazing.

Truly mysterious.

I may be clumsy,

I may be cringey,

I may be funny;

I guess that's me:

A dreamer.

Trying to be something more...

A dreamer,

Named Sophie

That wishes she could do it all.