I can’t raise my hand without the fear of being incorrect

But your mind won’t let you go even though you can

I can’t ask you how you are

I can’t knock on a door or ask for extra napkins

I can’t hang out with friends

What is anxiety?

It is not being able to live your life

Like being trapped in a cage that’s unlocked

Drowning but you are still afloat on top of the water

Like suffocating but still being able to breath

It is like wanting friends but you can’t talk to them

And being frozen in time while wishing and dreaming about a different life

 It is a condition that only I can understand

I am afraid of every little thing that pops up in life

I am afraid of talking

I am afraid of what tomorrow might bring

I am afraid of asking a question

My hands get sweaty

I can’t even out my breath

I can’t speak without my words coming out jumbled

A line for food, no

Looks like I will go hungry ‘til next meal

People talking about something that interests me, no

I will listen and regret it later that I didn’t join in

Need something from the store, no

I will find something else to replace it with

Each minute, day, month, year that passes is a battle with myself

I live my life always being uncomfortable

Too many thoughts run through my head like people trying to get out of a disaster

Each thought giving me something to be fearful of

My heart always beating at super speed

My brain thinks that I don’t belong

I don’t want to feel this way but I do

I force myself to go and stay

I don’t know what to say

It’s hard to stay when you want to go

Even though no one can see my battle

They think I am fine

Honestly, I am not fine or okay

I have anxiety every day of my life