I don't wanna say it. I don't wanna face it.
But the pain's excruciating- it's suffocating. . .
It dares me to let it run wild-
But I have a face to save, a heart to keep.
I was always the outcast - beaten up, called names.
F*****, was it?
But I grew stronger, each day -
My soul hardened itself, every moment,
It fed on my suppressed anguish.
-- I finally made up my mind to say it out loud
To let it run wild - free.
But they didn't accept me -
Said I was a disgrace to the family.
Everybody said to change the way I am - or keep shut-
"Silence is your only way."
There was no miracle - I didn't have a best buddy
Or a Love to support me.
Nobody would want me -
"And I guess that's okay?", I thought.
"BUT THAT'S NOT OKAY.", my heart screamed out.
She too, told me to go away, I don't deserve to even exist -
She didn't care that I loved her.
I waited on her for so long-
See, I'm just a 'normal' transgender.
But I would have still loved her back. . .
Even if she had shattered everything of --
Me.