Depressed | Teen Ink

Depressed

August 8, 2011
By WithPenAndScript DIAMOND, Venetia, Pennsylvania
WithPenAndScript DIAMOND, Venetia, Pennsylvania
72 articles 232 photos 251 comments

Favorite Quote:
I believe that no matter who you are we all leave footprints on this Earth


I’ve slept twelve hours, but I don’t hear the clock
Its hand slowly moves around the face
I’m in a huddled mass under clean linen sheets
But I feel no warmth from them or smell the spring breeze

The last time I ate
Was it a day?
Maybe a week
But the thought of consumption
Leaves me doubled over and nauseous

I lay in bed when the children run outside
I don’t move a muscle, frozen like in freeze tag
Then the treacherous shadows are mocking again
They dance along the wall until the sun is gone and the moon arrives

I curl up in a little ball, my heart tucked and hidden
Maybe if the world doesn’t see, they won’t know it’s been bitten
And ripped apart, tossed away
It feebly beats, but tomorrow may be its last day

Before I wanted nothing more than to leave this prison house
To venture into bright summer days
But the tumult of despair has punctured me
My chest is an open wound and its contents are pouring

There goes my heart, the ripped up little mass of muscle
And my lungs dutifully follow its lead
I can’t take a proper breath,
Are their stones resting on the hole in my chest?

And through the remains of my shattered entity
Comes the last part to cripple and seep through the sore
It was once white, like the linen sheets, and pure
But a world of darkness painted the spirit black as despair

I’m a muddled mess of what once was
The days go but I know no time
The prison will stay my prison; I don’t want to see my release
Let my final day be here, maybe then I’ll find my peace

For my brain did not pour out, no it stayed in my head
It was stupid, it didn’t warn me, for it was naïve
But now I’ll grab the rope and I’ll escape
The never ending punishment I cast unto myself

You said you didn’t care, apathy was rampant
My rock that strengthened me eroded into dust
I was left alone to face a storm
And didn’t have a soul to trust

I explained it all, I wrote in the letter
After all the world pulled me through
It ripped me apart
And spit me out again
To just get by was the plan
But in the end my way was better


The author's comments:
This is my own story weaved into the words of this ballad. But In the end I made the right choice...I am here. I survived. I felt like the contents of me...The essence that made me who i was had poured out and I felt empty and tired of it all. But I fought back. And I am a survivor.

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This article has 1 comment.


Vidra PLATINUM said...
on Dec. 1 2011 at 6:54 pm
Vidra PLATINUM, Midlothian, Virginia
46 articles 17 photos 89 comments

Favorite Quote:
“I write only because
There is a voice within me
That will not be still.”
-Sylvia Plath

I just wanted to let you know that you are a fabulous writer.

:)