Barefoot, Helpless, and Broken | Teen Ink

Barefoot, Helpless, and Broken

December 11, 2008
By Kiana Baker GOLD, Alto, Texas
Kiana Baker GOLD, Alto, Texas
12 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Barefoot, helpless and broken-
she forces a smile for me.
I watch her travel long dirt roads that lead to broken dreams.
I reach for her, to take her away,
She tells me:"No, I want to stay."
I let her make her own mistakes and leave her there alone.

Barefoot, helpless, and broken-
alone without a friend.
Precious life slipped through my fingers...should've saved her then.
I watched her travel long dirt roads that led sudden death...
to wash myself away in guilt until there's nothing left.
Her face appears, sometimes at night,
her beauty just the same.
She tells me: "This is not your fault, our friendship hasn't changed."
Before my best friend disappears,
we reminisce through all those years,
before I'd faced my biggest fear
of losing half of me.


The author's comments:
This poem is about losing a friend. I have never experienced this literally, so the emotion in this poem was slightly difficult... I'm not sure if I quite pulled it off, so please feel free to comment.

Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 16 comments.


on Jul. 22 2015 at 1:28 pm
mechanicalpencil13, Midland, Michigan
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"We can complain because rose bushes have thorns or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses." -Abraham Lincoln

You haven't experienced this literally? This was so accurate-it made me cry. you are so talented. don't stop writing.

on Oct. 1 2011 at 4:02 pm
Annibonny DIAMOND, Evanston, Illinois
67 articles 38 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes life takes a path that is hard to walk on, so all you have to do is put on your hiking boots.

I love this! It has so much emotion. Great job!

anne.Brooke said...
on Jun. 18 2011 at 9:09 am
anne.Brooke, Mumbai, Other
0 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
I&#039;d rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I&#039;m not.<br /> -Kurt Cobain

:)........................

on Apr. 8 2011 at 8:55 am
you are a amazing writer :)

anne.Brooke said...
on Feb. 14 2011 at 9:45 am
anne.Brooke, Mumbai, Other
0 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
I&#039;d rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I&#039;m not.<br /> -Kurt Cobain

Your poems depict emotions beautifully...very sharp,very precise and totally thought provoking. Keep writing...there's a lot that I've to learn from you...

on Sep. 9 2010 at 4:33 pm
Of_The_Broken SILVER, Bradenton, Florida
5 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
God is a comedian, playing an audience to afraid to laugh.

Your amazing!

megan? said...
on May. 3 2010 at 8:50 pm
You showed emotion, quite well. I lost my best friend. This is what it's like..

Lexaaa. BRONZE said...
on Apr. 12 2010 at 6:59 pm
Lexaaa. BRONZE, Marshfield, Massachusetts
1 article 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
If everyone else&#039;s opinion is what matters, then why do you have your own?<br /> -Nineteen Minutes; Jodi Picoult.

all of your peoms are amazing... you'll be on the best seller's list someday :)

on Feb. 27 2010 at 5:14 am
paranomial PLATINUM, Hyderabad, Other
21 articles 0 photos 55 comments
i love all ur poems so far,u really depict them out well..:)

on Feb. 23 2010 at 1:23 pm
Malory_Sturling BRONZE, Medford, Massachusetts
2 articles 1 photo 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Good writing can make you look at something unbelievable and doubt yourself by believing that it is real.&quot; &hearts;<br /> <br /> &quot;You can get a thousand compliments, but one failure can tear you down; don&#039;t let it.&quot;<br /> ~Malory Sturling &hearts;

OH MY GOSH!!!! AMAZZINNGGG!!! everything that i have read of yours so far is so good. love it!

on Nov. 20 2009 at 8:32 pm
SophaDee SILVER, Westport, Connecticut
7 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;We&#039;re all pretty bizarre. Some of us are just better at hiding it, that&#039;s all.&quot;- The Breakfast Club

The wording in this poem is really powerful, and especially if you haven't experienced this before i think it was a really good interpretation of what it feels like to lose a friend (i wouldn't know either, but still.)

on Nov. 9 2009 at 11:26 am
BeautifulSoul BRONZE, Toledo, Ohio
4 articles 0 photos 37 comments
I love the way you choose to word your poems. All of your poems are wonderful, because you elaborate them by making your words an image. You write poems that no one can understand the first time they read it, but that's a good thing, because you want to draw people into your writings and that's what you do. People really have to analyze your writings in order for them to relate to your poems.

You are one of the best writers I have come across. So don't ever let anyone destroy your passion, because the fire of your passion for writing shows through every poem that you have wrote.

Over all I just want to say keeping writing and never let that fire inside of you for writing, burn out!!!

I also hope you can read at least one of my poems and give me some feedback, Thanks and keep up the good work =-]

on Aug. 7 2009 at 8:32 pm
ElizabethW. DIAMOND, Oconto, Wisconsin
72 articles 2 photos 28 comments
Trust me, you pulled it off. If you hadn't said anything, I would have thought you had written this while sobbing next to their grave or something. You portray emotion so beautifully.

on Mar. 3 2009 at 1:42 am
mamacassx33 BRONZE, Rotterdam, New York
4 articles 6 photos 22 comments
i am in love with your work i have been submitting peice after peice if you ahve any tip fro me i would love to get them....btw all you poems are amazing and i love your writing style!!!

on Feb. 28 2009 at 5:42 am
This poem is AMAZING! Even though I never lost a friend, I felt as if it happened. Keep up the good work!!

on Jan. 13 2009 at 4:05 pm
Even though you may not have personally experienced this yourself,

you had me fooled.

It was beautiful and heartbreaking because the poem allows you to feel as if you are losing a friend.

At first I didn't understand what it was about but the ending brought it into a strong, full closure.

That was good for this poem because just like she was losing her friend I was losing myslef in the writing, and then at then end I didn't even need you to tell me, because I felt it.