Gone (mixture of hiakus and tankas) | Teen Ink

Gone (mixture of hiakus and tankas)

May 12, 2010
By bound4life4ever PLATINUM, Jamaica, New York
bound4life4ever PLATINUM, Jamaica, New York
32 articles 0 photos 111 comments

Favorite Quote:
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.


we walked and we talked
About the things on our hearts
You held my hand tight
You moved in way to fast
You have lost my attention

But then i went back
to you. what is wrong w. me?!
should have known better!

we walked and talked
aboutt things on our hearts
you held my hand tight
promising not to let go
i fell for that stupid lie

the truth stared at me
then you told me what i feared,
"i have a girlfriend"

i felt very numb.
it all happened to quickly
you were gone.again


The author's comments:
this is a mixture of hiakus and another type of poem called a tanka. this poem in based on a personal experienece. i hope you like it

Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 3 comments.


on Aug. 23 2010 at 8:22 pm
Alcanno DIAMOND, Mexia, Texas
59 articles 0 photos 670 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you love life, don't waste time, for time is what life is
made up of."

-- Bruce Lee

Oh. Thats really cool! Thanks for replying!

on Aug. 23 2010 at 8:07 pm
bound4life4ever PLATINUM, Jamaica, New York
32 articles 0 photos 111 comments

Favorite Quote:
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

tanka is just like a haiku but a haiku is 5,7,5 for the syllables in the lines

a tanka is 5,7,5,7,7 for the syllables


on Aug. 15 2010 at 1:54 pm
Alcanno DIAMOND, Mexia, Texas
59 articles 0 photos 670 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you love life, don't waste time, for time is what life is
made up of."

-- Bruce Lee

I really like this and can relate! The flow is really good but I've never heard of a tanka. Can you explain what it is please? - your poem has me wanting to know more about it. Anyway, Great job!