alone together | Teen Ink

alone together

August 2, 2009
By ChrisAMoore PLATINUM, Saint Augustine, Florida
ChrisAMoore PLATINUM, Saint Augustine, Florida
24 articles 8 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hey guys I have old work on this profile, but I stopped for about two years now. I got back into it now because I found that art and expression is me. So I hope you like the things I post from now on more lol


It started off
As unexpected
Barely anything
Was even said

But then I asked
Fur us to be alone
At first
No feelings were shown

But then a smile
An entrance to the unknown
And the secrets
We both already know

I saw the twinkle
In your eyes
Then a stare of meaning
No wrong or lies


You open up
And I come in
It happened slowly
But it was done in the end

You come close
Then wait
Then come closer
I stay

Her eyes move
To my lips
She strokes my chin
With her finger tip

Her warm breath
On my face
Reminding me of
Our good days

(it)fills me deep inside
It makes me wanna be
A better guy
I want her to see

So I decide
You and me
Its no coincidence
Its meant to be

Though unexpected
Our love was shown
All it needed
(was for)us to be alone....

together

The author's comments:
this i made for "3.1.18.12.5.5" <3

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This article has 6 comments.


on Jan. 29 2010 at 5:06 pm
RebeccaR PLATINUM, Racine, Wisconsin
21 articles 0 photos 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it.
-- Jonathan Winters

You seem like you are bewitched by whoever you are writing about. It's not cheesy. It's nice and pleasant

twiwrite GOLD said...
on Jan. 21 2010 at 2:47 pm
twiwrite GOLD, Modesto, California
14 articles 0 photos 111 comments

Favorite Quote:
none :P

i like this one. its really good.

on Jan. 10 2010 at 8:26 pm
This was really good! It's my favorite out of your poems. "(it) fills me deep inside, it makes me wanna be a better guy" is that sort of catchy refrain that makes a good song. My only suggestion would be to maybe rephrase the second stanza, and change the line "no feelings were shown" to the active voice rather than the passive voice, because while I see that you were trying to rhyme, the sentence flow is a little awkward. Other than that, keep up the good work :))

carol said...
on Nov. 6 2009 at 12:02 pm
whatever its still written!

on Oct. 29 2009 at 7:15 am
cutelilpoet01 GOLD, Jackson, Michigan
10 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
" I may be selfish, impatient, a little insecure and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, you sure don't deserve me at my best." Marilyn Monroe

I Love this one. I been there. lol

on Aug. 7 2009 at 1:00 am
blackamethyst GOLD, Centerville, Ohio
11 articles 0 photos 132 comments
i really like it, and i can relate :)