The only thing worse than feeling pain is knowing you put it on others.
Knowing your the reason for their tears.

My heart is falling apart.
I have sewn it together so many times.
I patch it up with my own two hands, only to rip it open.

The monsters chew at my flesh, and I let them.
They/I gnaw at the seam until it bursts open.
I bleed on the inside.
Only to let the process repeat again.

My heart is wrenching.
I can feel it begin to tear.
I bring my knees to my chest- as if somehow it will hold me together.
As if somehow this will all go away.
As if somehow everything will be okay.
As if.