No, You're Not Dating! | Teen Ink

No, You're Not Dating!

March 22, 2024
By Twizzy SILVER, Wilmington, Delaware
Twizzy SILVER, Wilmington, Delaware
6 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
All the way to Mars


We all hear it, if you’re in school you probably hear it everyday. It invades our lives in person, over the phone, especially on any social media platform. I’m guilty of it myself and I’d bet that anybody reading this is too. This one black mark on the beautiful language I love, a blemish on an already flawed culture. The phrase “we’re dating” plagues the people everywhere that English is spoken. Here’s the thing… you are not dating. 


While many people tout that they are “dating” someone else, in reality this is a huge semantical and grammatical error which shall not stand. Wikipedia would say that dating is “a stage of romantic relationships in which two individuals engage in an activity together, most often with the intention of evaluating each other's suitability as a partner in a future intimate relationship.”. It would only make sense if dating meant, obviously, that you are going on dates together. But if you met in school and spend your time together at school, and very very rarely go on actual dates then you’re not dating. You pop the question and make yourselves an item you could say that “it’s official” or you’re “together” or even that you two are just snuggly huggly love birds destined to marry each other. You are lots of things together but dating is not one of them. So many couples you see in high school and essentially every middle school couple don’t actually 

go on dates. Maybe you guys liked each other enough to go on two dates, see a movie or maybe go out to dinner, you are believe it or not dating because you are engaging in activities together and evaluating each other’s sustainability as a partner in a future intimate relationship. Once you two stop going on dates you’re not really dating anymore you’re just in a relationship. I understand that saying “we dated” implies a less than stellar outcome with you two dating but not ultimately getting together but this works under the logic that dating is completely separate from the relationship itself. So if this is true than you can date AND THEN be together, being official lovebirds doesn’t make you still dating. While couples can still go on dates and be dating, this is separate from being a couple. Some perfect marriages are between two people who are not dating, some people who are dating would be awful, no-good, very bad, couples.


I understand how difficult it is to not join the infected and crumple to your knees, obey the overlords and submit to the phrase. I often find myself saying it without thinking, a Freudian slip of the tongue the only thing standing between a brainwashed society and my morals. When you hear somebody say something so many times it’s easier to say than to not. It’ll always be easy to be one of billions who say it; but if you care about whats right in the world and dare to be different… When you see two people in school you’ll say they’re a couple. Until you see them at dinner together you’ll say “no, you’re not dating”.


The author's comments:

It's alright


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