The harsh judge. | Teen Ink

The harsh judge.

May 11, 2023
By Anonymous

Excessive self criticism is what holds lots of people back from lots of things. I often compare my work with others that are more successful. Most of the time it isn't even just that it's the fact that I can't keep my head straight for too long and have lots and lots of negative thoughts which lead to Excessive self criticism. In my own opinion though, excessive self criticism is when an a person constantly and harshly judges themselves, like just always focusing on their flaws and the bad things that happen. When that happens it can be bad to one's mental and emotional well being and can lead to negative self talk, low self esteem, and even depression. People who are excessive with self criticism may constantly compare themselves to others and feel like they don't meet someone's expectations . They also have loads of expectations for themselves and feel like they always fall short. This can lead to self-blame and self-doubt that's difficult to break. One way to deal with excessive self criticism is to practice self love and compassion for ourselves.


Like with doing that you have to treat yourself with the same kindness, concern, and understanding that you would offer to a good friend and anyone you'd care about. Instead of focusing on your flaws and mistakes, try to acknowledge your strengths and accomplishments. It's always important to remember that nobody is perfect, and making mistakes is a natural part of the learning process. Another helpful strategy is to challenge negative talk. When you catch yourself being like that, try to reframe your thoughts in a more positive way. For instance, instead of thinking "I'm so stupid for making that mistake," try to think "I made a mistake, but I can learn from it and do better next time." Finally, it may be helpful to seek support from a therapist or counselor. They can help you identify underlying issues that may be contributing to your self critical behavior and provide you with tools to manage it more effectively. Another example would be from myself like I struggle writing. I have no confidence whatsoever but here I am writing this. It took a lot to even think about what to write about let alone having to think about how to start and finish. Even with all of that, I looked up ways that could possibly help me with my writing and there are good suggestions on ways to get over it but to actually overcome it is something that has to come from yourself deep within. yes it may sound silly but it's true. It has to be something meaningful to you to not want to feel negative about it and when you learn how to, that makes you wanna overcome challenges after challenges. Thats why its most important to see what can help you from within find something that can help u want to push forward and start to self love and not have so much negativity.


The author's comments:

It contains information on self criticism, and ways to better our mind sets on self love.


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