Wandering Soul | Teen Ink

Wandering Soul

April 21, 2011
By Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."


Summary:

The world as we know it came to an end in June, year 1290 when the nuclear war broke out. People claimed that the Cold War had come to an end in the late 1900s when Mikhail Gorbachev came into power and the U.S.S.R. fell drastically from its high position. It turns out people were wrong.
For years instead, it had been brewing malignantly beneath the roofs of the two sides’ heads. It was on the whim of two said to be extraordinary men under normal circumstances that it happened. Yet it was not under normal circumstances when the first bomb was released so suddenly, upsetting before killing the most optimistic of a people there ever was in a hundred years. But after so many great years, it was only fair that the world took such a rough turn.
Nobody, however, accounted for the world’s end on their agendas. Nobody was prepared. I, barely settling in my first year at college, certainly was not prepared.


Theresa E.

Wandering Soul


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This book has 127 comments.


on May. 22 2011 at 1:49 am
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

Well, thanks anyway. I appreciate the feedback. It'll definitely come in handy when I finish the story and go back to edit :)

on May. 21 2011 at 11:09 pm
taylorf463 GOLD, Marion, Kentucky
13 articles 0 photos 152 comments

Favorite Quote:
If he'll lie for you, he'll lie to you.

An ending was an ending. No matter how many pages of sentences and paragraphs of great stories let up to it, it would always had the last word.

I get that. That's usually how books start. And the plot is the most important thing anyway. I wouldn't worry too much about characters anyway. :)

on May. 21 2011 at 10:45 pm
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

Yes, I kind of thought about the plot before even thinking about the characters. Everything about them, I came up with on the spot. I do intend to fix those gaps. It may be challenging to weave something in, but I have a much better idea of what's going to happen now. Thanks for the comment! :)

on May. 21 2011 at 10:30 pm
taylorf463 GOLD, Marion, Kentucky
13 articles 0 photos 152 comments

Favorite Quote:
If he'll lie for you, he'll lie to you.

An ending was an ending. No matter how many pages of sentences and paragraphs of great stories let up to it, it would always had the last word.

First things first. This novel is voted #2... it must already be pretty darn good. And it is. The story doesn't go into great detail about what's happening which is good, it keeps focus on the plot. But also sometimes leaves gaps. I like the way you have talked about the characters but maybe a little more of an into expansion. Just a thought. The spelling as well as punctuation is very good. I didn't notice any grammar or tense mistakes and I think this novel has great promise. The plot is very unique and it's captivating. Keep going! :)

on May. 21 2011 at 9:04 pm
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

I will! Just as soon as I get over this writer's block (and exams). 

on May. 21 2011 at 4:05 pm
kkayla3897 BRONZE, Ogden, Utah
1 article 0 photos 39 comments

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! Keep going!!

 


on May. 13 2011 at 12:36 am
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

Thanks so much for the comment!!! :) I'll be posting more soon.

on May. 12 2011 at 11:35 pm
AddictedToWriting BRONZE, La Grande, Oregon
3 articles 5 photos 124 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Writer's Block is when your characters get fed up with all you put them through and go on strike." -- Anonomous
"A Writer is someone for whom writing is more difficult than it is for other people."--Thomas Mann

Wow.  I liked this.  Like, a lot.  Um...I know I said I would look for things to critique...but I kinda got caught up in the story and forgot... hehe...  Because of this, I think it's safe to say that there aren't very many, if any, outstanding errors in this work--it's extremely unusual for me not to catch things that need work.

Amazing job!  Very well written!  Hope to read more soon!!!


on May. 12 2011 at 8:52 am
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

Thanks! I'll take the advice into consideration :)

AnnaBanana said...
on May. 11 2011 at 9:09 pm
I think it should be fast paced at the beginning as this is what keeps the readers wanting more.  With each new chapter, more is revealed.  I think odd chapters should reveal and even chapters action...

on May. 8 2011 at 11:55 pm
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

Thanks. I agree that the pace may be a bit too fast, especially in the first paragraph. I'll definitely work on adding more descriptions :)

on May. 8 2011 at 11:50 pm
JadedSoul SILVER, Evans, Georgia
9 articles 0 photos 37 comments
It was a very interesting read... A bit confusing as it was slightly fast paced... Generally when I read a novel, I find myself skipping lines and para's cos they're boring.. I couldn't find anything boring here though... Keep the good work going.. As for suggestions, maybe you should describe a teeny bit more... But overall, it was superb.. Keep writing.. :)

on May. 8 2011 at 9:01 am
SarcasticPersonInTraining BRONZE, Woodbury, Minnesota
3 articles 0 photos 48 comments
haha no probs :) just adding to a great story :)

on May. 7 2011 at 10:56 am
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

Yes, that definitely helps. I’ll be sure to try to slow the story down--maybe rewrite the first chapter. Thanks for the feedback :)

alex198 said...
on May. 7 2011 at 9:03 am
alex198, |, Other
0 articles 0 photos 113 comments
This is a really good story. It's interesting and I love how the first chapter was called The End :P One thing to watch out for is that the story moves very quickly and can sometimes be a bit confusing. Make sure you explain everything as you go along. Hope that helps! :)

on May. 6 2011 at 11:24 pm
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

Thanks so much! And I’ll be sure to add more details of the main character. I thought I was lacking something somewhere. Thanks for taking the time to comment :)

on May. 6 2011 at 6:15 pm
SarcasticPersonInTraining BRONZE, Woodbury, Minnesota
3 articles 0 photos 48 comments
very interesting idea! i love the story so far, and i love the characters. though, i think you should maybe give alittle more descriptive details about the main character, Rose. Just like phsyical appearance. but very cool story :)

AnnaBanana said...
on May. 6 2011 at 3:25 am

Garnet77,

You are way too polite!!  Relax and let the words flow out...keep up the good work!


on May. 6 2011 at 2:34 am
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

The rest is on its way. I’m still writing the story, so I’ll post as I finish each chapter. :) Thanks for the comment.

AnnaBanana said...
on May. 6 2011 at 2:29 am
It was riveting...couldn't put it down...where is the rest???  One suggestion for the title of the second chapter which you might want to consider "Beginning of The End"